


Hunters in Space

by MayRaven1798



Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation, Supernatural
Genre: Crossover, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, F/M, Humor, Sexual Humor, What-If
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:27:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 24
Words: 34,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28483116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MayRaven1798/pseuds/MayRaven1798
Summary: This is a work of humour. What would happen if ‘Team Free Will’ ended up on the Enterprise-D? asked no one ever. I read another short story by ffrindyddraig (by the same name) where Sam and Dean end up on the bridge but it’s empty. This time the ship is humming with all the usual suspects. Features interaction between some of my favourites.Update: if you are lurking and looking for smut...skip to Ch. 17. I also increased rating from teen to Mature because of language and sexual situations.
Relationships: Castiel & Wesley Crusher, Dean & Guinan, Dean Winchester & Deanna Troi, Dean Winchester/Deanna Troi, Sam Winchester & Data (Star Trek), Wesley Crusher & Jo Harvelle
Comments: 57
Kudos: 23





	1. Red Alert

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Hunters In Space](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18633367) by [ffrindyddraig](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ffrindyddraig/pseuds/ffrindyddraig). 



> Any takers? Am I the only weirdo who ever wanted to see this? Maybe. The ScoobyDoo episode of Supernatural was awesome. I can’t promise this will be as good.
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own anything pertaining to either Supernatural or ST TNG. I am just borrowing the characters and their world for some fun.

There was a blinding flash of light. It burned through their collective retinas and into their brains. Then darkness. Slowly, as their visions returned, a beam of rotating red passed by and filled the expansive, warehouse-like room. 

“Hey Dean, do you hear that siren?”

“Yeah Sammy, ‘cause I ain’t deaf. Blind maybe.” 

The elder brother rubbed his painful eyes and tried to look around. Sam was ahead of him, as per usual, trying to get a sense of their surroundings.

“There’s something weirdly familiar about this place.”

“Maybe we’re on a battleship, or some other military cruiser?”

“All the metal and the tech definitely feels like it.” 

“Hey, where’s Cas?” 

Sam and Dean Winchester whipped their heads around in a chaotic effort to find their friend. They spotted him a moment later; or at least the souls of his shoes. The rest of him was behind a very large, very strange looking craft. While Dean rushed over to check on the fallen angel Sam stayed at the ready, covering his brother with his riffle full of rock salt. It honestly wouldn’t do them much good, but it looked threatening and would hurt like a bitch if he was forced to fire.

“Cas? Cas, come on man! Wake up!” Dean shouted as he shook his friend by the shoulders and tried to rouse him.

“Is he out?” asked Sam, the urgency in his voice rising.

“Like a light,” Dean huffed with frustration. 

Suddenly, a team of soldiers in striking yellow-gold and black uniforms marched into the echoing chamber and surrounded them. Sam moved cautiously to put his weapon down on the ground.

Dean, who wasn’t armed at this point, put his hands in the air. Then he recognized the uniforms. “Oh for fuck’s sakes!”

“Dean, shut up,” grumbled Sam. Of course he recognized them too, but didn’t know if this was real or not. He already had his hands up when an intimidating, ogre came to stand in front of them. He seemed to be the one in charge.

“Who are you and how were you able to board this ship?” demanded the monstrous man.

Dean started laughing, he just couldn’t help himself. Sam warned his brother to shut up.

“Be quiet,” he hissed.

“I would listen to your friend if I were you,” noted the man in charge,

“Come on? Next Gen? Seriously?” Dean complained. “Why couldn’t we have at least gotten Kirk?”

Sam rolled his eyes and could feel his face was turning red. “Don’t listen to him. He’s having an off day,” he grovelled.

“You know of Captain Kirk?” questioned the man they now recognized as Lt. Worf—a Klingon not an ogre.

“Sure, I’m his cousin...Dean Kirk,” snarked Dean as he put his hands down at his sides. “And this is my brother, Sam Kirk.”

“Oh God,” whined Sam with embarrassment.

Just then Castiel groaned from behind the Shuttle nacelle. Worf turned his attention on the third intruder as the scruffy man in a creased trench coat sat up and squinted at him.

“You poor man. What’s happened to your head?” asked Castiel with innocent concern. Of course this just made Dean start to snicker all over again.

“He didn’t mean anything by what he said,” explained Sam. “He’s honestly never seen a Klingon before.”

“A Klingon,” muttered Dean through his laughter. “Oh man...this is hilarious. Good one Gabriel.”

“Why did you say that, Dean? Did you see my brother?” asked Castiel.

“No, but this is so his idea of a joke.”

“Excuse me,” said Worf with authority. “If the three of you are done with your foolish banter, I would advise you to come with us.”

“Come on, Sammy. You heard the Klingon,” said Dean with enthusiasm. 

He clapped his brother on the shoulder before helping Cas to stand. Together the trio followed the team of security officers out of the Shuttle Bay.

......


	2. Star Struck

Dean, Sam and Castiel were shown to a conference room of sorts. Cas was mesmerized by the field of stars passing the window.

“Are we in space?” asked the angel.

“Yeah, Cas,” whispered Sam. 

“Some would say that it’s the final frontier,” added Dean with a smirk.

“Stop that. I thought you didn’t even like the show?” said Sam in an accusatory fashion.

“Come on Sammy, you watched it a lot back in the day. I couldn’t help but catch some of it.”

“Show? Are we in a television series?” wondered Cas with renewed worry.

“Shh, don’t let them hear you say that,” said Dean, only half-joking as he hinted at Worf lingering by the door.

Cas nodded slowly as he eyed the strange warrior holding them captive. “Yes, I can see how they might not believe this is a fictitious universe.”

“It does look and feel pretty real,” commented Sam as he sat in one of the luxurious high backed chairs.

Dean was about to harass their host when the door swished open. Three new people entered the room and the hunter’s mood instantly improved when he laid his eyes on the raven haired woman among them.

“Hey, beautiful,” cooed Dean, flirtatious smile crinkling the corners of his eyes.

Deanna smiled back reflexively, but her eyes remained cool and calculated. He could tell that she was far too intellectual to fall for his usual bag of tricks.

“Hello, my name is Captain Jean-Luc Picard. This is Lt. Commander Data, my chief science officer and Counsellor Deanna Troi. You have somehow managed to come aboard the Enterprise by a means undetectable by our sensors. I ask that you explain yourselves.”

Since Sam was always the most sincere and knowledgeable, Dean and Castiel expected that he would take the lead. However, the taller hunter was star struck by coming face to face with none other than Picard himself and couldn’t seem to find his words.

“I, uh...you see sir..uh...well...”

“Good job, Sam,” said Dean as he moved between his idiot brother and the characters from his favourite sci-fi series. “What Sam is trying to say is that we don’t know how we got here. I mean, one moment we were in a trailer park and the next we’re on board the ‘love boat’ here.”

“USS Enterprise,” Data promptly corrected him.

“Yeah, I know. I was kidding around,” Dean remarked. 

“I think it would be best not to kid around right now, Dean,” advised Castiel from his right.

Dean shot his angelic friend a look before turning back to the officers. Having both Data and Cas in the same room was already getting on his nerves. 

“We were there and now we’re here,” blurted Sam ineloquently. 

Dean had a sinking feeling that they were screwed; especially if he was going to be the one to do all the heavy lifting. He hid his face in his hand and shook his head.

Deanna was smiling at their visitors’ absurd interactions. “I think that they’re telling the truth, Captain. I don’t sense any deception. Perhaps confusion and disorientation,” she said in hushed tones.

“May I ask, what is a trailer park?” questioned Data with interest.

“It is a large flat grassy field where people install their mobile homes to the available amenities such as water and power. They are usually charged a monetary fee for the utilities they use and space they occupy,” rambled Castiel.

Dean gave his friend another look. It was a mixture of ‘you seriously knew all of that’ and ‘don’t tell them that’. Cas seemed to catch his general meaning and stopped talking.

“It sounds as though you are not from the twenty-fourth century,” noted Data.

“No, we’re from the early twenty-first,” muttered Sam.

“Seriously?” Dean scoffed. “Should you be telling them that?”

“Why not?” rebutted his brother. “It’s obvious that we don’t belong here. We’re wearing plaid, denim and leather and they’re wearing some sort of futuristic spandex.”

“They do look as though they are wearing their sleep clothes,” whispered Cas in agreement.

“We met another man from a time period slightly later than yours and he too commented that we appeared to be wearing our pyjamas,” said Data.

“Oh, wow...this is too much. It’s like nerds in stereo,” groaned Dean.

Deanna giggled and held a hand over her mouth. “Sorry. I know you’re upset,” she began.

“Lady, upset is the tip of the ice burg,” he said harsher than necessary. She was undeniably attractive, but he was not in the mood to be flirty with her anymore.

“I suppose it’s safe to say that none of you have any relation to Captain James T Kirk,” said Picard.

“No, sir. Sorry about that. My brother, Dean, he gets carried away sometimes,” said Sam with humility.

......


	3. Let’s get physical

The visitors were escorted to Sick Bay next to be sure that they weren’t carrying any concerning pathogens and to search for further clues as to how they got there.

Dean was in a bad mood, which only improved slightly when the lovely red-haired doctor began scanning him.

“You have a lot of unusual scars,” Beverly reported as she arched a perfectly shaped eyebrow.

“If you’d like I can show them to you sometime...you know in the tradition way?” Dean offered with a wink.

Beverly blushed slightly and cleared her throat. “I might take you up on that offer, Mister...”

“Dean, call me Dean. Mr. Winchester is my dad...though he’s dead now...so never mind.”

“Dean, what the hell is wrong with you?” snapped Sam from behind him.

“I dunno, Sam. I feel a little funky, like I can’t remember what year it is, or where I left my keys,” he rambled. Then Dean made a face and moaned. “Damn it, my Baby’s all alone somewhere.”

“Your baby?” questioned Doctor Crusher with alarm.

“It’s his vehicle, ma’am,” explained Castiel. “He loves it like a person, or a pet.”

“Or a lover,” muttered Sam.

“Hey, don’t you be like that,” Dean huffed at his brother. “My Baby is family and you know it.”

“Okay, well...physically you’re fine, mostly. Your liver could use a reprieve from alcohol consumption and I think you might have a sliver or two of metal lodged in your rib cage, but otherwise you’re healthy,” said Beverly with a wary smile. “I think it might be a good idea to have Counsellor Troi assess you though.”

“That’s the shapely brunette from before, right?” questioned Dean with another smirk.

“Yeah. But a word of caution,” she replied smartly. “I don’t know if you know what sexual harassment is, but it’s a big no-no here.”

The smile fell from Dean’s face. “Okay, fine. I was just being friendly.”

Sam muffled a laugh and looked to the ceiling. “Oh boy, did she get your number.”

Next was Castiel’s turn. He sat gingerly on the bed and tried not to look uncomfortable. The doctor knit her brows together and frowned. “Um...this doesn’t make a lick of sense,” she said rather tersely to herself. “Why do I read you as a monumental being of energy shoved into a pristine, almost unmarred human body?”

“Wow, that medical tricorder is obscenely accurate,” commented Sam, his eye brows disappearing somewhere under his fringe.

“Accurate? I thought you three men were from Earth? From the past?” she question pensively.

Castiel squirmed in his seat and opened his mouth over and over again, but could not quite find the words to explain. He started to look like a suffocating goldfish and Dean bounced in to save him. 

“Yeah...well. Maybe it’s like an alternative Earth?” he said, using all his brain cells. “Like...in our history there really are boogeymen and vampires.”

Sam facepalmed and shook his head.

“Yes, Sam and Dean hunt these anomalies and keep people safe,” Cas informed her with something akin to pride. “I help them.”

“Uh, okay....and what are you, Castiel?” Beverly prompted skeptically.

“I am...” Cas saw the look of trepidation in Dean’s eyes and thought better of being too blunt. “As you say. A being of immense energy inhabiting a human male.”

The woman nodded slowly, but still didn’t quite know how to log that answer. “Sure,” she replied with a laboured grin. “Well, you’re as healthy as an ox. Which is good news considering you were the only one of your group to lose consciousness.”

“Okay, do Sam next,” Dean said all too excitedly. It was like they were at a carnival and she was reading their palms or something.

Beverly giggled a little before catching herself. Damn Dean was so attractive he could recite the alphabet and turn her into a silly school girl. She put on her serious doctor face again and scanned the tallest of the men.

“Sam is just about as clean as Castiel, save the scars like Dean has,” she said with satisfaction. “You could use more protein in your diet, though. An adult male of your size and build should probably be consuming twice as much as you currently do.”

Dean clapped his hands loudly and yelled, “I knew it! Dumb veggie lifestyle.”

“Shut up, Dean,” Sam growled. 

“Look, all the food is replicated in this era,” explained the doctor. “So eating any kind of protein shouldn’t matter.”

“Yeah, but I’ll know...” Sam muttered unconvinced.

“Suit yourself. At least access to food and lots of it won’t be a concern while you’re here,” she added kindly. “Other than that you’re good to go. Although....I do have one other question.”

All three looked around at one another before nodding in unison. It was quite something to see. “Um...you all have the same tattoo. Is it tribal?”

Dean smiled and answered her question. “Yeah...it’s like a family crest of sorts.” It wasn’t a lie. It was a tradition now to have their chosen family adorned with the symbol to stop demonic possession.

“I see. That’s very interesting,” she noted. 

.....


	4. Babysitters Club

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel and Wesley get acquainted in Ten Forward.

It was after that the trio was split off. Dean was to go for a session with Troi so that she could further investigate their intensions and his sanity. 

Sam somehow got paired with Data. He mentioned something about being a scholar and the android jumped at the chance to assist him in researching a possible resolution to their predicament.

As for Castiel. He went to the mess hall, or as these people called it ‘Ten Forward’ so that he could observe the culture of this century. Of course he required a babysitter of sorts too. However, he thought the teenaged boy was a rather strange choice.

Wesley Crusher was sitting on a stool, leaning on the bar and sipping his cherry soda through a blue straw. His mom let slip that their visitors were from an earlier time period and he couldn’t help but stare at the angel—not that the kid knew that was what he was looking at.

Castiel grinned at the way that the red drink made the blue plastic straw turn purple. Wes noticed that the man with crooked tie was watching his mouth. It made him uneasy at first until he realized that Cas was looking at his straw and not being a pervert.

“You want one?” Wes asked politely. “You can order almost anything here.”

Castiel hesitated. He knew these so-called people were only fictional characters from a television show, but he couldn’t deny how alive they felt. He could almost sense their souls. 

“I don’t normally require sustenance,” he told the boy. 

“Hmm, you sounded just like Data when you said that,” Wesley commented. “Are you an android?”

Cas shifted in his seat. He didn’t know why, but everything felt so sterile here—so heavenly—that it made him uncomfortable. He had become accustomed to the Winchester’s Impala and the dive motels they stayed in. Nothing ever really felt clean, but at least it was usually comfortable.

“That’s the robotic man with the iridescent skin?” he asked as he regarded the boy’s drink again.

“Yeah...so weird. It’s like everything you say is how he would say it.”

“He is a being made up of a body and electrical impulses...I suppose we do have some similarities. Only I am not man made. I was made by God.”

Wesley smiled and leaned his jaw further into the palm of his hand. “Is religion still a big deal in your time period?”

“In some parts of the world, yes,” Cas replied. 

“So you believe in heaven and hell and all that?” It was a simple question. One that Cas had been asked many times before.

“I not only believe, I know they exist,” he answered quite seriously.

The boy’s smile widened if that were possible. “Really? You believe they exist? ‘Cause here we are in space, light years from Earth and I have yet to see this god of yours.”

Castiel rolled his eyes at the youth. “Heaven is not a physical place you can reach by means of conventional travel. It is a spiritual construct of divine invention.”

That got Wesley’s attention. He was all for a valid argument theoretical or otherwise. “Okay. I get it now. It’s like another astrological plain. Like a layer of existence beyond what we can comprehend in our current state of evolution.”

Castiel gave him a lopsided grin. It was rare to meet a person so young with any actual intelligence. Most often Dean was like a teenaged boy in arrested development. Cas was sure that his intelligence was only thanks to Sam pushing him to educate himself.

“Yeah, something like that,” Cas conceded. “You know. I think I will try one of your carbonated sugar drinks.”

Wesley sat up straighter at signalled the bartender. “We’ll have another cherry soda please.”

......


	5. Decorum

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean has a session with Deanna.

Dean looked a round the low lit room while Deanna made some preliminary notes on her PADD. 

“We have those where I come from,” he said casually as he gestured to the device in her hand.

“You do? Interesting,” she hummed, followed by more notes.

He chuckled as he spotted a ficus in the corner. “I think I’ve stayed in a motel room or two with a similar motif to your office.”

Deanna smiled slightly and watched him with her impossibly dark eyes. “You have?”

“Yeah...the late eighties decor, the plants...” He smiled awkwardly, but when she didn’t respond further he decided to drop it.

Deanna returned to her PADD. Dean was feeling a little out of sorts by how she kept her exchanges so brief. He needed to get the ball rolling. 

“So I guess you and your gal pal chatted about what I told her during my exam. About how we hunt supernatural monsters and such,” he rambled as he leaned back on the plush sofa.

She fixed him with a less than stellar glare. “‘Gal pal’?” she repeated, clearly offended. “Yes, Dean. My colleague Dr. Crusher and I discussed your case as one health professional to another. I hope that’s alright with you.”

Dean shifted in his seat. He never meant to sound so sexist. He was just trying to get the woman to loosen up. They always looked so warm and chummy on the show. He really couldn’t understand why she was being such a cold fish. Where was all the hand holding and warm hugs?

“Yeah, sure. It’s cool,” he said after a moment of hesitation; afraid of saying the wrong thing. “Interesting fact,” he said rather abruptly, catching her attention again. “My grandmother was named Deanna. I’m actually named after her.”

The empath softened a little and crossed her legs. “That is interesting. Were the two of you close?”

“No...sadly I never met her,” he replied with a frown. Technically he had, but she didn’t really know who he was at the time. “I didn’t know most of my family growing up. It was mostly me and Sammy and our dad.”

“That must have been hard,” she said sympathetically. “Was it your father who taught you to hunt...these unnatural things?”

“Yeah, actually,” he told her openly. He finally felt like they were connecting and it was a relief. “He was a good man, my dad.”

“And what about Castiel? Is he your...boyfriend?”

Dean sat up straighter and corrected her. “Oh no. I mean...he’s a friend and he’s a guy. But he’s like a brother to me and Sam.”

“Oh, I see. My mistake,” she said with a grin before making a few notes.

“Hey...whatcha writing there?” He laughed uncomfortably and tried to sneak a look.

“Nothing. You just seem rather defensive,” she replied, moving away from him. “I know that historically certain types of men, perhaps those raised in a very stern, male dominated environment would have been strongly discouraged from exploring their curiosities and affection pertaining to other men.”

“Whoa, lady, I am not a closet case. Okay? I love women. I’m generally a boob guy. And you, dollface...you’re just my type. Dark hair, dark eyes, curves and great cleavage; with a touch of the exotic,” he ranted. 

When she began typing again instead of responding verbally. Dean lost what was left of his temper. He slapped his large hand over her screen and made her look him in the eye. “Look, Deanna, I am not crazy. Where I come from the things we hunt are real.”

“I’m sure that you believe that,” she told him flatly.

“You’re the psychic...or empath, or whatever. You can tell that what I’m saying is the truth.”

She gave him a curious look then. She was not aware that he would know that about her yet. She certainly hadn’t disclosed this fact herself. “No...I can tell that you believe that it’s the truth. The problem with delusional people is that they believe their delusions,” she explained.

Dean sat back again and let out a long breath in exasperation. 

“I’m sorry if I came off like a defensive, sexist asshole,” he said at long last. It was sort of an apology and she seemed to accept it as such.

“And I’m sorry I haven’t been more sensitive to your plight. You’ve been ripped from the world you know and thrown into the unknown. Jumping forward in time could be detrimental to even the most sane person.”

Dean grinned. “Maybe being a little nuts is a good thing then? It’ll help me cope.”

Deanna leaned forward and gave him a wink. “Couldn’t hurt.”

......


	6. Truth be Told

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Data bond.

Sam was back in the conference room enjoying his luxury executive chair. Data was seated opposite him and pulling up the requested information at a speed that was making the human’s head spin. 

“Wait. Stop. Go back a few screens,” said Sam as he studied the information on potentially parallel phenomena. “Of course...why didn’t I think of that right away,” he added with a sour chuckle.

Data regarded the visitor for a moment before his curiosity got the better of him. “You are referring to the Q Continuum?” he asked. “Why would you have thought of the Q before now if you are not from this point in history?”

Sam grimaced. He had forgotten that he wasn’t meant to know anything about this reality. “Well...see the thing is...” He knew they were meant to keep things on the down low, but then he considered who it was asking the question. Maybe Data was the best person to explain everything to.

“So, in the place where and when we’re from,” Sam explained, hoping he was coherent enough for the android to follow. “This place,” he said gesturing around him, “the Enterprise and the Alpha Quadrant...it’s fictitious. See, me and Dean know of you because you were characters on an old television series. So that’s how I know who and what Q is. And he is so the type of person to do something like mix up our realities like a bartender making margaritas.”

Data seemed to be digesting his confession. He furrowed his brow and tilted his head, making Sam smile at the sheer awe of witnessing the familiar body language in the flesh. And this was no actor, although that would have been pretty cool too. This was the real as life android.

“You are saying that we, myself and my crew, exist within stories written and developed for an ancient form of entertainment?”

“Exactly,” Sam concurred.

“Why did you not simply say this to my captain upon your arrival?” he inquire innocently.

“Because we would have sounded insane.”

Data could understand that concern. “I suppose most happenstance involving Q are rather inconceivable,” he noted with a small upturn to one corner of his mouth.

“Yeah, I bet. See we have a similar entity. We used to think he was a trickster, like Q,” the hunter explained. “But now we know that he’s...well...he’s an angel.”

Sam watched for Data’a reaction to this new information and crossed his fingers that the android’s head didn’t explode. That would be all he needed on his conscious, accidentally killing the real version of a beloved tv icon. Luckily, no such thing happened.

“That is quite interesting. The members of the Q Continuum are quite omnipotent, divine almost in their abilities. It sounds as though this angel is just as unpredictable and un-angelic as our Q.”

“Yeah, he’s a dick. Bending reality and time on a whim.”

Data almost voiced his query as to the significance of calling a person a dick. But he quickly found an internal reference and let it go. “This does sound like one or the other could very well be the cause of your misfortune.”

Sam grinned again. He wasn’t so sure that this was so bad. “Well, at least I got to meet you.”

Data grinned slightly in return. “Sam, you say that you know us because of a program meant for entertainment...May I ask, do you enjoy the character closely resembling myself?

Sam’s smile faltered momentarily. He wasn’t entirely sure how to answer. “Sure, Data. You’re such a great character. Created by a brilliant scientist who refused to have you treated like a machine. And you...you believe in his dream and long to achieve a humanity in yourself. It’s like they say; the true reward isn’t in the destination, but in the journey along the way. And man do you get a great journey.” He didn’t add except for the movies that followed the show, because that would be unfair.

“It is remarkable to attain feedback on one’s own life and purpose,” said Data. If he could have emotional moved he would have been to hear someone think so highly of him. “Thank you, Sam. Now let us attempt to come up with a solution to your problem and find a way to get you home.”

“Are there any known summoning spells for Q?” asked Sam.

“I do not know. However, Q has an affinity for Captain Picard. Perhaps he knows of a way to get his attention.”

“I’m sure he can think of something.” Sam thought affinity was putting it nicely. It seemed to him as though Q enjoyed torturing the man. He only hoped that the captain would be open to helping them.

......


	7. Ring of Fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A ritual brings Q into our story. Was this a good idea? Is it ever?

Captain Picard was an anthropologist at heart and amateur archeologist in his spare time. So he was more than a little excited when he got the low down on the Winchesters’ plan.

They were all on an holodeck, a perfect location for a ritualistic summoning. Dean and Sam told Data what they needed in terms of objects and symbols to appear around the space. And boy did he deliver. Worf was also present, because he insisted. If his captain was participating in a potentially dangerous ceremony, the chief of security was going to be there.

“This is so cool,” murmured Dean to his younger brother. “I wish we always had one of these in our back pockets.”

“Only time will tell if the summoning will work with artificially projected elements,” said Sam, always the realist.

“Hopefully it will work,” whispered Castiel. “You would not believe the look of distain I got when I asked about getting real goat’s blood.”

“Hey, the lovely red-head Doctor offered to extract our own blood without the need to cut ourselves,” added Dean, impressed.

“So, this is what you do to summon....spirits?” interrupted Picard. He was given the task of pouring a perfect circle of holy oil. Even though he was not entirely pleased with the notion that they would be lighting it on fire—for real—he was still pumped to be part of their ritual.

“That’s a little different,” Sam informed him. “This one is for summoning something a little more powerful.”

“Well, I think even if the ritual itself doesn’t work it will still probably get Q’s attention,” the captain reassured them.

Sam began reading an incantation from their father’s journal. Castiel pulled out his angel blade for protection and Dean palmed his lighter, ready to toss it on the oil.

Data arched an eyebrow as a wind began blowing through the high ceilinged room. “I did not program this to happen,” the android told Picard.

“You are telling me that the ritual is having an effect on the environmental controls of the ship?” the captain questioned.

“It would seem so, sir,” replied Data.

Worf didn’t like this one bit. He could feel the change in the atmosphere and got battle ready, phaser in hand.

As Sam spoke the last few words of the incantation the wind died down and everyone stopped talking. 

It was quiet...too quiet. 

Then a sudden flash of light, similar to the one that had enveloped the hunters and brought them therein the first place, blinded them from the center of the circle.

And there stood Q in all his glory; red Starfleet uniform and Admiral pips. “You called?” he purred.

Before anyone could answer, Dean threw his lighter on the ring of oil and the whole thing lit up. 

Q looked around at the flames surrounding him and scoffed. “This is new. What sort of archaic barbarism is this?”

“It’s biblical for ‘we own your ass’,” Dean declared smugly.

Q squinted through the flames at the source of the unfamiliar voice. “Oh, really? And what are you? You look more monkey than man.”

Dean was about to step froward when Sam put out a hand to stop him. “Dean, the fire, seriously.”

“Do you mean to say, Q,” said Picard, “that you honestly don’t recognize these three men? That you have nothing to do with their sudden appearance on my ship?”

“Never seen them in my entire expansive existence,” replied Q. Then he narrowed his eyes at Castiel. “Wait...that one is no mere mortal. What are you and what’s with the wingspan?”

Sam and Dean exchanged a look and then stared at Cas. “He can see your wings?” blurted Dean, mildly offended for some reason.

“I suppose if this Q person is attuned with the universe in a similar fashion to myself...he could be able to see them,” reasoned the angel.

“Then you do have wings?” asked Data, his interest piqued.

“Yes,” said Castiel with the shrug of one shoulder.

“Hmm, fascinating,” noted the android.

“Blah, blah, blah,” whined Q. “Bored now.” He snapped his fingers and the flames went out. He stepped out of the circle, much to Sam and Dean’s surprise and approached Picard. “So you say they just showed up out of no where? Colour me intrigued.”

“Yes. Seeing as this fit your usual brand of chaos we surmised you were the cause of their displacement,” said the captain.

“And the one with the wings didn’t do it?” prodded Q.

“Which one has wings?” inquired Worf. “They all look the same with their alien attire and unshaven faces.”

Dean rolled his eyes in annoyance. “Look it doesn’t matter. What matters is that this dick is probably lying,” the hunter shouted in anger.

“Dean, shut up,” chided Sam.

“Yeah, Dean. Shut up,” mimicked Q. Then he made a gesture of zipping his mouth shut and Dean’s lips were sealed, literally. He couldn’t open his mouth anymore and he was not happy about it.

“Some people’s children,” the omnipotent being tutted. “So Jean-Luc, you want me to get rid of the scavengers. Throw them in a worm hole? Toss them into a super nova?”

“No, Q,” Picard retorted firmly. “If anything they need to go back to their own time.”

“Hmm, I think it’s a bit more complicated than that,” rebutted Q. “I think they belong in another dimension. Which makes things a little trickier.”

“But you could do it?” inquired Data. “It is within your ability.”

Q frowned at the mechanical man. “I can....but it would be easier to have the same entity who displaced them send them back. You know in case I guess wrong and they change your current timeline permanently.”

“I have never seen you turn down a challenge,” noted Worf with doubt. “Can you at least bring forth the entity that you speak of?”

Q’s eyes lit up. “Now that’s a wonderful idea!”

“Dear, lord...is it though?” wondered Picard, unconvinced that having more than one deity-like being on his ship was safe.

“Hang tight, Mon Capitain,” said Q lyrically, “I’ll be back in a flash.” With that Q snapped his fingers and was gone.

Dean let out a string of profanities when his mouth was released, Q no longer strong-arming it shut with his powers.

“What the god damn fuck was that dipshit talking about? Are we seriously just gonna kiss his ass and pray that he doesn’t pull some bullshit move and send us into fucking oblivion?”

All eyes were locked on the hunter in shock of what he had just allowed to escape his mouth.

“Language, Dean,” said Castiel.

“Whatever,” he groaned. He went and picked up his lighter from the floor. “This was a bust and I need a drink.”

“Mr. Worf,” said Picard, “please follow our disgruntled guest to Ten Forward and make sure he behaves himself.”

“Aye, sir,” concurred Worf. He couldn’t help the smirk that revealed his sharp teeth. He didn’t much care for Q either and was starting to like this Dean guy after all.

......


	8. Miss American Pie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean finally finds someone to flirt with and has some pie. All in all he has a good time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am having so much fun with this story! I hope my readers are too. Thank you for your comments and kudos. I will try to keep the plot the going :)

Dean walked up to the bar and straddled one of the stools. An exotic looking woman with a large hat approached and gave him a sultry smile.

“You must be Dean,” she said lyrically as her smile broadened.

Dean wanted to say ‘and you’re Whoopi-freaking-Goldberg’ but knew that wouldn’t go over well. So he swallowed down his excitement and flashed her a flirtatious grin. 

“I suppose I must,” he purred as he leaned towards her a little. “You don’t happen to have pie here do you, gorgeous?” Dean caught his faux-pas too late and he apologized immediately. “Sorry, sometimes my tongue gets away from me. I know you classy women of the future don’t like being treated like sex objects.”

Guinan leaned towards him as well and batted her big dark eyes at him dramatically. “Baby, you can use your sexy tongue to call me whatever you like. You are one fine looking man and I have no objection to being told how amazing I am once in awhile.”

Dean chuckled at her refreshing attitude. “In that case, I haven’t seen lips as luscious as yours in too long and your eyes,” he added as he took her hand, “Your eyes look like they hold all the mysteries of the universe.”

“Mmm, you know they do,” she replied playfully. “I tell you what, my delicious dish...you name the pie and I will bring it to you.”

Dean wasn’t sure if it was the way she was looking at him or the promise of endless pie, but he could feel the heat rising within him. “Let’s start with apple.”

“A la mode?” she drawled.

“Nope...naked, like God intended,” he quipped.

Guinan straightened her posture and fanned herself. He wasn’t the only one getting turned on.

“Coming right up,” she said seductively. 

He watched her walk away and felt cheated that she was dressed in such loose attire. “I bet eighties Whoopi has an amazing ass,” he sighed to himself.

Someone suddenly grunted beside him and Dean turned to find Worf glaring at him.

“What?”

“Nothing,” said the Klingon.

“You can’t tell me you’ve never wanted to hit that?” Dean asked suggestively as he gestured to where Guinan had been standing a few moments ago.

“Do you desire to fornicate with every woman you meet?” countered Worf.

“Pretty much, unless she’s super old, or super nasty.”

“Hmm,” was the only additional comment.

“Hey, don’t judge me. I work hard and I like to play hard too,” Dean told him defensively.

Guinan arrived then and placed the apple pie in front of her patron. Dean began shovelling it in his face right away.

“How is it?” she asked with a frown. She was slightly less attracted to him now that she had witnessed him eat like pig.

“Oh man! So good!” exclaimed the hunter, his mouth full of pie.

“You want another slice, maybe?” He was almost done devouring the first already so she thought she should offer.

“Mm, cherry this time,” he replied after swallowing. “And I would love a beer, anything with real alcohol would be awesome.”

Commander Riker sat on Dean’s other side just as the cherry pie was being delivered.

The hunter gave the well groomed man an auspicious look and Riker held out his hand.

“Commander William Riker,” he said.

“Dean Winchester,” came the reply. They shook hands and Dean indicated his plate. “Have you tried the pie?”

“On several occasions,” said Riker with his blue eyes sparkling with amusement. “Which is that?”

“Cherry,” said Dean.

“Hmm, I’m a pecan man myself,” he said after a moment of giving it some thought.

“Good choice. But I’m not always in the mood for something so sweet,” offered Dean.

The commander chuckled and gave Worf a look while their guest filled his face. 

“You know, when I was told that our unexpected visitors were hunters from the twentieth century I wasn’t exactly expecting to meet someone so attractive,” rambled Riker.

Dean choked and put his fork down. He had to take a long gulp of his beer before he was able to speak. Sadly, his beverage was not as pleasing as his pie and it showed on his face.

“Twenty-first and I appreciate the sentiment, but I’m straight.”

“Straight?” repeated Riker not quite understanding what he meant.

“Dean thinks you are coming on to him,” explained Worf. “He seems to think everyone should want to come on to him.”

“Well he is fairly good looking,” Will conceded as he let his eyes rake over the hunter again. “But I wasn’t propositioning you. I was merely making an observation. It seems out of the ordinary for men who dedicate their lives to dangerous and often perilous work to look so...pretty.”

“I could say the same about you,” snarked Dean in response. “Most of the people I’ve met here look like models, or actors.” He chuckled a little at his private joke since he knew that this was the factual case. In his reality they were actors.

“Touché,” noted the commander. “Well if you are looking for some fun, I like to have a few of my friends over for a weekly round of poker. I have a feeling you and your brother might be familiar with the game. You’re welcome to join us if you want.”

Another thinly veiled proposition. Dean was sure this guy was into him. “You’re inviting me and Sam to play poker?” 

“Sure. It’s this evening in my quarters,” said Will. “Deanna will be there and so will Data.”

Dean was now trying to gauge if this guy was genuinely friendly, or if he had any ulterior motives. It was entirely possible that he was trying to get Deanna back for something. But Dean honestly felt like they had worked things out, so seeing the empath again so soon didn’t bother him. Maybe he could even win her over.

“Sure. I can’t speak Sammy, but I will definitely be there.”

“Great. And don’t worry about having the money for a buy in,” explained Riker. “We only play for fun.” 

“And honour,” added Worf.

.......


	9. Relax

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An interlude where our three heroes regroup.

Sam was sitting on one of the beds in their assigned guest quarters. He found the room just like he remembered from any one of the episodes. It was minimalistic in its decor and so very beige.

Castiel was sitting in a chair at the table. He had his eyes closed, but he wasn’t resting. No, he was reaching out to try and find ‘Angel Radio’ if such a thing existed in this dimension. So far he was coming up empty.

Dean entered the room after giving a polite greeting to their guard at the door. He sat down next to his brother and bounced the mattress. Sam, who had been researching—he was always reading—startled and clicked his tongue.

“Damn it, Dean. Some warning would be nice,” he chided.

“Come on, loosen up,” Dean said with on overly cheery lit. “This is like a mandatory vacation. If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em.”

Castiel opened his eyes and scowled. “Something tells me your mood has shifted for a reason,” he said, anticipating that he would disapprove of whatever this reason might be.

Dean grinned at his friend and put an arm around his brother. Sam made a face to convey his misgivings.

“We’ve been invited to poker night with Will Riker,” beamed the older hunter. “That means they like us.”

Sam made Dean remove his arm and he stood to pace the room. “No, Dean. It means you think you have an in and you might get lucky.”

“In more ways than one,” Dean added with a suggestive flare.

“This is about sex, isn’t it?” Cas groaned. 

“Oh come on. Loosen up. Q has got this.”

“Yeah, well you don’t trust Q anymore than anyone else,” Sam protested. “Plus...isn’t it sorta out of character for him to show up and then disappear without causing more mayhem? I mean, where the heck is he?”

Dean frowned as he gave Sam’s concern more thought. It was true. They had summoned him hours ago and he still hadn’t returned. Usually once Q was on the scene he stayed until well past his welcome.

“Um, huh. I don’t know,” commented Dean at last. “Maybe us being here has thrown off the formulaic patterning used in each episode.”

Sam was more than a little surprised to hear his brother say something so insightful. “What?”

“You know..? They open with friendly banter, something happens to create conflict or a moral dilemma. Then they find a way to solve it and then we end with either more banter, or one of those weird scenes where the viewer is left going....wait a minute that didn’t seem right.”

Castiel cocked his head to the side as he listened to Dean explain the style of the show. “Does every episode happen this way?”

Sam was chuckling. He had to admit that Dean wasn’t wrong. “Yeah, more or less. So we are not the conflict?”

“I have been wondering if we are here for another purpose,” Castiel interjected. “Have there been any strange, or unexplainable things occurring on this ship?”

“Good question, Cas,” said Dean. “Maybe we can ask the key characters at the poker game.”

“Dean, no!” objected Sam.

“Oh come on. Your android buddy will be there.”

“No.”

“Sammy, if this was a case we would be finding a way to blend in and collect information, right?”

“He has a point,” admitted Castiel.

Sam sighed and shook his head. “Fine. We’ll go and play poker with the crew.”

Dean did a fist pump he was so excited.

“What should I do?” asked Castiel, knowing he would be lost if made to play with them.

Sam gave it some thought. “You were hanging out with Wesley earlier,” he said more than asked. The angel nodded and waited to hear more. “That kid was always solving important problems. He knows a lot about everything to do with the ship and maybe even hears things that people discuss because he’s dismissed for his age.”

“Boy, do I remember what that was like,” grumbled Dean thinking of his own childhood.

“So, you want me to delve further into my friendship with the adolescent as to discover if he may have inadvertently become aware of something that everyone else has overlooked?” prodded Cas.

“Exactly.”

“But don’t keep him up past his bedtime, or his mommy will get mad,” joked Dean.

“Dean,” Sam whined.

“What? Doctor Crusher looks like a woman you do not want to mess with,” his brother stated frankly.

“Fine. I will pretend to make nice without keeping him up all night,” Castiel confirmed.

“I would make a joke about your phrasing, but it would be too inappropriate,” noted Dean.

Sam rolled his eyes and Cas looked as confused as ever.

......

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The poker scene is kicking my ass, but I will keep at it ;)


	10. Poker Face

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poker night at Riker’s is productive in more ways than one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried to keep this simple with so many players. Also...full confession. I reread the earlier chapters and I am embarrassed by how many times Sam tells Dean to shut up. Wow. It’s a lot. It should be a drinking drinking game.

When the brothers arrived in Commander Riker’s quarters, escorted by Worf of course, they were pleasantly surprised to find a good number of people waiting to get started. Will offered them drinks as was customary. Sam declined wanting to keep with wits about him, while Dean readily accepted the greenish ale in a tall, slim glass.

“I saved you a seat,” said Deanna as she caught Dean’s eye. 

The older hunter smiled with appreciation for her desire to sit so close to him. Will seemed less keen on the idea and frowned at how cosy the pair where getting. 

Sam saw the exchange and for the first time tried to figure out which season they had landed in. Things were notoriously hot and cold between the first officer and the empath, but sometimes they were more ‘on’ than ‘off’ again. 

The other players around the large table were Data as dealer with his signature transparent green visor, Geordi directly next to the android and Beverly. That meant that all the main characters were present except the captain and the teen genius.

“Do you usually have this many people to one of your game nights?” asked Sam as he managed to fit in between Worf and Crusher.

“Not usually,” replied Worf.

“I think we were all more than a little intrigued to socialize with our unusual visitors,” added Beverly as she leaned in and gave his knee a squeeze under the table.

Sam’s eyebrows went up reflexively at her overt physical flirtation. He had forgotten how sassy the doctor could be since she usually got pegged as the healer, or the captain’s back up romantic interest.

The younger hunter cleared his throat, but didn’t have the heart to remove her hand. “And Data, do you always deal?” he asked as he tried to distract himself.

“It is the most logical position for me,” the android explained. “Since I am able to calculate any and all outcomes of the cards dealt it would be redundant for me to actually play. This way I may participate and observe the interactions between the players.”

“Data really wants to understand what makes a good bluff,” noted Geordi.

“Trickery and any form of falseness elude me,” Data concurred.

“Yeah, that will change,” said Dean without thinking. Most eyes turned towards him before he realized that he had spoken out loud. “Oh, I mean...you know,” he squirmed, “the more you learn the more you’ll understand.”

“That is my ambition,” said the android in agreement.

Dean was relieved that he had dodged that bullet. No sense getting into things that haven’t happened yet; like Data firing a weapon on Kivas Fajo with intent to kill and then denying he knew anything about it. Or the whole rigamarole with Lore. Now that was a Winchester sized mess right there.

“Good for you,” said Sam, giving his brother a disparaging look. Dean shot one back as if to say he knew he had screwed up and to let it go.

They played a few rounds after that. At first both Sam and Dean seemed to be holding their own. Then the tables started to turn and Riker started to win more often. It was as though he had started off as a courteous host letting them win a few rounds before stealing the shirts off their backs.

Dean would have been angry and resorted to cheating, but it wasn’t real money and he was getting a kick out of being beaten by a person created in a writers’ room. 

Sam, on the other hand, barely noticed. He spent the evening geeking out with Geordi and Data. Who knew that he knew so much about warp cores? Dean could barely trust his brother to help with repairs to the Impala. 

“Say, has anyone noticed anything odd lately?” Dean inquire after another swig of his drink. He wasn’t sure what it was—Romulan, Vulcan—but it was starting to loosen him up. “You know, blinking lights, unexplained noises, the smell of sulphur?”

“Subtle, Dean,” said Sam.

“No, I don’t think anyone’s reported anything unusual,” replied Geordi, speaking from a maintenance standpoint.

Worf looked as though he was giving it some thought. “I did receive a report of an unknown intruder on deck ten yesterday, however the sensor logs showed no evidence of any unauthorized personnel and a thorough sweep came up empty.”

“Yesterday? Like before we arrived?” prodded Sam.

“That is correct. I had not considered that your arrival and this incident could be related,” noted Worf.

“I cannot name names, but the incident did leave a female crew member rather shaken,” said Deanna. “Apparently this person turned up in her bedroom after she had just taken a shower.”

“Was he eating some sort of confectionary treat?” Beverly wanted to know.

“She did say he was eating a chocolate bar,” confided Troi.

“I heard about something similar from one of my staff,” elaborated the doctor. “She thought she was sleep walking and that the man wasn’t really there at all. She said he was sucking on a lollipop.”

“Whoa, how long were you lovely ladies going to hold out on us?” complained Dean, clearly offended that they had thought he was crazy when he talked about how they hunted ghouls and monsters. Here they had actual proof of a perverted peeping ghost...or maybe...

“Dean, that sounds like the Trickster,” said Sam with importance.

“Trickster?” repeated Riker.

“Gabriel,” the two brothers announced simultaneously.

Data, who had witnessed their summoning spell recalled they had expected to bring a being named Gabriel to the circle. “This is omniscient entity like Q from your dimension, is it not?”

“That’s right,” said Sam. “Do any of you know what it—he—looked like?”

The two women exchanged a look with Worf. Deanna was first to speak.

“He was average height with unruly brown hair and the most unusual eyes,” she said.

“Right,” said Beverly. “They’re golden, but not at all like Data’s. More of a caramel gold.”

“Apparently he is no stranger to disrespecting authority,” said Worf. “While two of my officers were investigating the quarters in question they were each certain that the other was poking and agitating the other.”

“Like an invisible hand was tapping their shoulders, or poking their sides?” offered Sam.

“Or pinching their asses,” added Dean with an unnecessary bout of laughter. He wiped the merriment off his face and tried to get serious. “I know this is unorthodox, but could we read the official reports in case there is something else there?”

This time it was Riker and Worf having a wordless conference. “Sure,” said Riker. “First thing in the morning. I think we best call it a night and let you sleep off the alcohol.”

“I’m sober,” said Sam. “I would love to jump on this as soon as possible.”

“Yeah, well, I am a very functional drunk,” stated Dean. “So, count me in too.”

“I can show Sam the report from my nurse,” offered Beverly. “I’ll go retrieve it from my office.”

“And I can read Dean the edited account from my patient,” offered Deanna.

“That sounds awesome to me,” beamed Dean with renewed enthusiasm. Being alone with Deanna was his endgame, after all.

“Perhaps Data and I can comb over the sensor logs again,” said Geordi, wanting to be of use.

“It could take hours,” said Data to his friend, “however, I do enjoy a good mystery and you are quite a capable sleuth as well.”

“I’m sure he is,” noted Dean with a suggestive wink. “I’m sure the two of you could really dig in and spend all night together.”

“On the case,” added Sam, shooting Dean an ungrateful look. “Thanks, you guys. We appreciate anything you might come up with.”

“In the meantime, Worf and I can take another gander at the security logs,” said Riker.

“Well, I’m out,” Dean declared as he tossed in his last two chips and put down his cards. 

“It is unnecessary to call if you are folding,” corrected Data.

“Well, it’s not like I can cash out,” Dean explained.

Data nodded and turned to the next player. Geordi sighed and chuckled. “Yeah, I think Will and Dean have the right idea. I’m ready to get started on solving our mystery.”

Everyone started to get up and make their exit. Sam stayed behind to help clean up. He was good like that.

“Watch yourself, Sammy,” teased Dean. “I am still not convinced Riker won’t make a pass at you.”

“Dean, give it a rest,” replied his brother. “And behave with Troi. She is doing us a favour. Promise me that you’ll keep your hands to yourself?”

“Says the dork who had the beautiful doctor’s attention all night,” he snarked, missing nothing even in his slightly inebriated state. “You do know what a hand on your knee implies, don’t you?”

“Can’t you just answer my question like a person?”

Dean snickered, “Bitch.”

“Jerk,” snapped Sam.

“Now, don’t keep Bev waiting. Unless you prefer Will’s company over hers?” Dean snickered again and got himself a punch in the arm. 

Deciding that he had tortured his brother enough for the time being, Dean walked out of the room. He was expecting the Klingon to be waiting him and was pleasantly surprised to find only Deanna standing in an otherwise empty corridor.

“Hey, Dee, you sure you don’t mind being stuck with me?” he asked as they walked down the hallway.

“Hmm, you say stuck. I say gifted,” she mused. “Besides, I suggested we pair off in the first place.”

Dean paused to give the woman a curious once over. “Gifted? Like...you’re seriously looking forward to some more one on one time?”

The half-Betazoid arched an eyebrow and smiled in that beguiling way of hers. “We don’t have to go back to my office, you know,” she said with suggestive undertones. “We can go to my quarters instead.”

Now he was grinning from ear to ear. “Aren’t I technically a patient? Isn’t that rather unethical on your part?”

“Nope. You are a visiting party who I have decided is quite clinically sane and needs no further treatment at this time,” she mused.

Dean liked the sound of that. Even more so, he liked the way she was undressing him with her big dark eyes. “This night just got interesting.”

“I thought you might feel that way,” she told him with a lighthearted laugh.

......


	11. Every Guy Grab a Girl

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Beverly head back to her place; Cas says the wrong thing to Wes; and Deanna gives Dean a terrible surprise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special thanks to Stormysea__breaks, thesmileofawincherster and nebelneko and all my readers! Sorry this took a minute to post but it needed some tweaking.

After tidying up in Comdr Riker’s quarters, Beverly took Sam with her to read the report she had mentioned. Only she wasn’t directing him towards Sickbay. 

“Doesn’t your son live with you?” Sam inquired when they arrived outside her quarters.

“Nope. Not since he gained his independence. He absolutely refused to move back in with me when I came back from serving at Starfleet Command.”

“Oh, right. I remember now. You were away for a year,” he said without thinking. In a way he was glad she was there and not Pulaski. He did have a soft spot for the dancing doctor.

“YOU remember? But I just told you?” She looked slightly rattled by his statement.

Sam tried to shrug it off. He was no better than Dean when he referred to plot lines he should know nothing about. “Oh yeah...my buddy Cas was getting to know your son and he mentioned something about it.”

“Oh, I see,” she said, feeling more at ease again. “So what do you think? Want to join me for a night cap?”

“That depends,” he said as he came closer and lowered his voice. “By night cap you mean..?”

She giggled and boldly played with his hair. Then she tucked a misbehaving lock behind his ear, tickling him in the process. He was finding it harder and harder to get a good read on her.

“Joining me for a drink while we review my report,” she purred. “Why? What would you like it to mean?”

The hunter was more than a little intrigued by her flirtatious tone. He had been hoping to keep things simple—find out how they got there and get home ASAP. But Beverly was enticing and older women didn’t intimidate him in the least. Sam suddenly recalled something about her being a sucker for unusual men—the Trill, that guy whole evolved into energy, and who could forget that one time she got naughty with the ghost in the lamp? Besides, why should he let Dean have all the fun?

A small smirk played on his lips. “Frankly, the ways things have been going, I’m open to just about anything. I accept your kind invitation,” he said. 

They continued through the door, her arm looped with his. 

......

Cas sat patiently while Wesley finished his homework. It was something to do with quantum mechanics and it was way out of his realm of knowledge. He found himself thinking of Claire, Jimmy Novak’s daughter, and what she might be up to these days. He only hoped that he hadn’t traumatized her too much when he borrowed her body as an impromptu vessel.

Wesley looked up and blinked at the angel’s intent stare. “Why are you looking at me like that?” the teen asked, feeling uneasy.

“Apologies,” said Cas. “I did not mean to stare. My mind was preoccupied with contemplating a violation I recently committed on another young person.”

The boy’s eyes went wide. “Excuse me!?” 

“What did I say?” asked Castiel with innocent confusion.

“What kind of violation?” Wes asked with no less alarm.

“Oh, no...it was a spiritual, mind-body merging,” he said in an attempt to explain himself, only to dig himself a deeper hole. “It was completely consensual, however I do wonder if she was of an age to understand to what exactly she was consenting.”

“How old was she?” Wes asked, trying to give the man the benefit of the doubt.

“Perhaps twelve,” Cas said with a shrug.

“You sick bastard!” he declared, suddenly standing and backing away from him.

“Oh no, do not be concerned. You are not from the necessary bloodline, besides I am content in my current vessel,” Castiel explained, finally realizing the distress he had mistakenly caused.

“Your vessel? What the hell are you even talking about?”

“It is complicated, but it is by no means a sexual thing. I assure you. I often say things in a too literal sense, or with a context other than one that is intended. Please forgive me.”

Wesley calmed down a fraction. “Um, does this have anything to do with angels?”

“Why do you ask?” Cas countered, not wanting to get specific, but also curious why the boy would ask such a question.

“‘Cause after we hung out in Ten Froward I ran into this guy,” Wesley elaborated. “Or rather, I ran through him.”

“Did he say anything to you?”

“Yeah, he said something ridiculous about angels watching over us. He was so weird. Also...” he added with trepidation. “Afterwards, I noticed something sticky on the front of my uniform. It was in the shape of a handprint.”

“As in this person had touched you with a sugary substance on his hands?”

“Exactly,” the teen concurred. “But he didn’t really touch me at all. At least not that I felt. When I tried to go after him he was nowhere. As if he vanished.”

“Was this on the level we are currently on?”

“Sure, just down the corridor,” answered Wes.

Castiel stood and stared at the door, but didn’t move to leave. “By your description, this happened even before we conjured Q,” he muttered, mostly to himself.

“What? You conjured Q? Whatever for?”

“My friends and I were actually hoping to pin down the person you saw in the hallway, but we got Q instead.”

“That’s weird,” commented Wesley as he gave it more thought. “If Q was here, then where is he now?”

“We were asking ourselves the same question,” noted Castiel.

“Okay look, strange statements about doing unethical things to underage girls aside; I think you’re a good guy,” rambled the boy. “But if you’re trying to track down a semi-corporeal being from another dimension we should really get some equipment from engineering.”

“Do you know what we will need?” 

“Not really, but that’s half the fun,” said Wes with a grin.

“Now you are sounding like Dean,” said the angel, unsure that he was comfortable with this revelation.

......

Dean followed Deanna into her bedroom. She was on him in a flash, her hands exploring his well toned chest before finding their way up into his short hair. There was no question as to her intent and they both began to swiftly remove their clothes. 

Deanna was wearing the teal number with the skirt. It looked like it would take a few minutes to get it off, but she must have been well practiced in removing it because by the time Dean had shed his jeans and ripped off his multiple shirts over his head, she was lying naked across the bed with only her dark, curly hair draped over her shoulders for modesty.

Dean dropped his underwear and slid up next to her. He was silently thanking the universe for sending him such luck. Just as they were kissing and starting to entwine their limbs, the bedroom door swished open and Deanna—another Deanna—was standing there gaping at them.

“What in the hell!?” she cried, appalled at finding the hunter and her doppelgänger on her bed.

Dean whipped his head around. “Deanna!?” yelled Dean with alarm. 

“Dean, who is that!?” she shouted, trying to ignore the tantalizing sight of his bare ass.

The hunter looked back and forth between the woman who had just entered and the woman lying naked next to him. They were identical.

“Oh shit!” he shouted as he leapt off the bed. “If you’re you, who is that?”

The ‘fake’ Deanna pouted her lips and batted her eyes at him. “See what happens when you refuse to play your part? You get all jumbled up in someone else’s defunct plot line.”

Before Dean could demand more information than some awful, vague statement she disappeared into nothing.

“Heavens, were you seriously about to have sex with another me!?”

“Hand to God, I thought she was you!” exclaimed Dean, putting one hand over his heart and the up in the air; leaving the rest of his anatomy exposed.

Deanna’s face went from white as a sheet to bright red as her eyes raked over his naked body. “Cover yourself, Dean!” she blurted as she pretended to cover her eyes.

The hunter floundered with embarrassment as he reached for a blanket to cover himself.

“Sorry! Damn it,” he mumbled as through it around himself like a toga. 

“Why did you think she was me?”

“Because she said she was! She invited me back to her room—your room,” he explained. “I honestly thought we had made a connection.”

“I am your therapist, Dean. How unethical do you think I am?”

“You told me I wasn’t your patient anymore,” he said defensively.

“Well, it’s all rather fast, isn’t it.”

“Not where I come from it isn’t,” said Dean with a frankness she didn’t care for. “Oh damn, Sammy,” he added as he began scrambling to get his clothes back on. If his Deanna hadn’t been the real deal it stood to reason that Beverly could have been an imposter as well.

.......


	12. Two Madmen Are Not Better Than One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone comes back together and chaos ensues. Can our boys finally get home?

Beverly and Sam lay in her large, surprisingly comfortable bed. He was nibbling behind her ear and she was giggling in that girlish way of hers. It turned out she too liked to play hard.

She turned and gave him a wonderfully distracting kiss before laying her head on his bare chest.

“I have been giving it some thought—what we discussed during poker—and I have a confession to make,” she said while lazily tracing his tattoo with her finger.

Sam was enjoying their post coital cuddle. He had his arm around her lean body and he was running his fingers up and down her beautiful, exposed back. If this was all still a bunch of make-believe it was the best he had encountered so far. Way better than the last run around through different tv shows. She felt very real and so had the amazing sex they had just had. 

“Oh yeah, what do mean?” he asked with interest.

“Well, for starters, I was the one on my staff who had the surprise visitor,” she confessed.

Sam sat up a little straighter, an angry scowl on his face. “That winged asshole! Tell me that it only happen once!?”

“Only once, but the computer said that everything was normal and there was no intruder.”

“Gabe is a piece of work. I just don’t get why he would show up here ahead of us.”

Beverly sat up as well and put an arm across his broad shoulders. He tried his best to watch her dazzling blue eyes and not her lovely breasts. She had great breasts for a woman her age. It must have been the dancing and aerobics...and the fact that she wasn’t technically a real person. 

“Now that you mention it,” she said quite seriously, “I did get a sense that he was awfully sure of himself. A real brash character. However, he also seemed lost in a way. A little like you did when you first arrived.”

“Like he didn’t know how he got here either?” She nodded and he looked skeptical.

“What sort of thing can snatch something like Gabriel out of one place and take him somewhere against his will?” The very idea was troubling.

“Q”, Beverly noted plainly.

Sam smiled and pulled her closer to him. He laced his fingers into her red hair and kissed her passionately. 

“I should talk to Dean and Castiel,” he said, sounding impressed by her helpful insight. “But I might need to borrow Data to help reprogram one of your tricorders since I don’t have any of our usual gear.” 

“What are you planning to do?” she asked as she stroked his stubbled jawline with her thumb.

“Won’t know until I discuss it with the others,” he told her honestly.

“You don’t have to go right now do you?” she pouted.

“I’m sure it can wait,” he assured her. 

Only it couldn’t. The door chime sounded on the door, drawing their attention.

“Who is it?” called Beverly.

“Beverly, it’s Deanna and Dean,” came the empath’s voice through the comm.

Beverly reluctantly got out of bed to let them in while Sam started to get dressed. She answered the door covered only in her baby blue robe.

Normally Dean would have given her an appreciative wolf whistled, but his mind was in a tizzy.

“Oh no, we’re too late,” said Dean as he ungraciously pushed past her and went to find his brother.

“What is he talking about?” asked the freshly satisfied doctor.

Deanna reached out and pinched her friend’s arm even though she could sense that she was genuine the real deal.

“Ouch! Deanna?” Beverly chided pulling away.

“Sorry, Bev. I had to be sure,” said the counsellor. “I just caught Dean in my quarters with an apparition that looked exactly like me.”

“Really?”

“What!?” scoffed Sam.

“Yeah, it was one of the most harrowing moments of my life and I have lived through some awful stuff,” rambled Dean.

“Oh please,” snarked Beverly. “You were with someone who looked just like Deanna. How bad could that be?”

Suddenly, a ship wide announcement went over the communications system calling them all back to the conference room.

“Riker sounds upset,” said Deanna.

“Does he FEEL upset?” questioned Dean as he narrowed his eyes at her with suspicion.

“Yes, Dean,” she said flatly. “And you feel like a giant sucky baby.”

“Hey, I honestly liked you,” he said, hurt by her jibe. “You should be nicer to me. I would have rocked your world.”

“Dean, not the time,” said Sam as he hurried them on their way.

......

Everyone funnelled into the conference room just as Riker suggested. Only the two brothers and their friend stopped as they entered, surprised to see who was waiting for them.

“Gentlemen, I believe you know Gabriel,” said Riker as he gestured for them to continue inside and take a seat.

“Gabriel, Commander?” questioned Data as he sat down.

“The one and only,” announced the entity with a touch of razzle dazzle.

“Where have you been?” snapped Dean.

“So, long story short...everywhere and nowhere,” replied Gabriel.

The truth was that Castiel and Wesley had tracked him down stuck between levels in the back of someone’s storage unit. He was rather confused and so were they.

“That is not helpful,” grumbled Worf.

“No, indeed it is not,” said Picard who had just joined them.

“Okay...well...” Gabriel hesitated and then plodded onward. “Okay, so remember when you guys had a whole todo with a character on your holodeck named Moriarty? He wasn’t real, but became self-aware and tried to take over the whole ship.”

“It is odd that you know about that, but please continue,” said Picard.

“Well...that’s exactly what’s happened in this instance. See I made this universe real—or rather real enough—to play a prank on these dupes who refuse to do as they’re told. And I might have inadvertently made Q a little too real in the process.”

“You mean to imply that we are, as Sam explained before, merely fictitious players in a fictional reality,” offered Data.

“Sam told you that?” said Geordi, weirded out that his friend had somehow not shared this enlightening piece of information before now.

“Yes, Geordi. In confidence.”

“So, we are not real, but somehow we are just real enough for Q to be powerful enough to affect even you,” ranted Beverly.

“That’s right,” affirmed Gabriel.

“This is crazy,” mumbled the doctor.

“Finding Dean about to bed someone that wasn’t me, was crazy,” confided Deanna.

“Excuse me?” blurted Riker with offence.

“Oh, no. I wasn’t upset because it wasn’t me,” she clarified, realizing her choice of words was misleading. “I was upset because the woman looked exactly like me. She was using my likeness.”

“In my defence, it was a very good likeness,” said Dean.

Wesley stifled a laugh and Riker glared at Dean.

“Look, we’re getting off topic,” said Gabriel. “Although, Q totally stole that one from my playbook.”

“Getting us back in the right direction,” said Picard, ignoring the second part of his comment. “You claim to be some sort of omniscient being who has been bested by a make-believe copy of Q?”

“No, sir,” interjected Data. “Q is not a copy. There is no actual being such as Q; just as we do not actually exist either.”

“I’m sorry, but I exist,” said Riker sternly.

“As do I,” Beverly noted.

“Okay fine, you all exist,” said Gabriel with importance. “The big problem here is that we need to get the hell out of dodge, but Q is being a big turd and stopping us.”

“So what do you want us to do about it?” inquired Sam.

“I don’t really know,” replied the archangel with a shrug.

“Typical,” grunted Dean. “You think you are such hot stuff until you run out of ideas.”

“Hey, I have never run out of ideas,” retorted Gabriel with a hint of annoyance.

“Then, come up with something now,” Castiel dared him.

It was Geordi’s turn to chime in. “Moriarty was stopped by placing him in a proverbial ship in a bottle. What if you created a world inside of this world to trick him into inhabiting?”

“Like on the holodeck?” asked Wesley.

“Or even smaller,” added Picard.

“What about the box that Riker keeps his beard brush in?” said Q, suddenly appearing at the opposite end of the table to Picard. 

“Q!” shouted Picard. “Stop all this silliness.”

“Oh, mon capitaine!” Q shouted back. “Can you blame me? You heard Data. If I let the brutish flannel men go, we cease to exist. All of us. Most of all me.” 

A murmur of concern started to fill the room. Everyone sounded quite concerned that there could be a truth to what he was saying.

“Hold on,” said Sam raising his hands in a T formation. “This is ludicrous. Are you actually entertaining the idea that you keep us here just to ensure you don’t suddenly blinked into nothingness?”

“He’s right,” stated Wesley, “this is not what we stand for. They have every liberty to return home.”

“I beg to differ,” said Q to the boy. “You of all people should be on my side. You do want to live to see the end of puberty, don’t you?”

“Don’t talk to my son like that,” Beverly growled protectively.

“I will talk to him however I please!” shouted Q in return.

“This is nuts,” Dean whispered to Sam.

“Tell me about it,” Sam whispered back.

“Hey Cas,” Dean murmured to the angel. Can you get Gabe to ‘angel’ us out of here while that Q windbag is distracted?” 

“I can try,” replied Castiel just as quietly. Cas locked eyes with Gabriel and spoke through their angelic connection. Gabriel smirked. Then he surveyed the room to be sure Q was still arguing with Picard and Crusher and then snapped his fingers.

The room froze, including Sam, Dean and Castiel. But not Gabriel and Q. The archangel frowned at the false deity.

“You think you’re so clever,” quipped Q.

“Oh, come on!” Gabriel whined. “Let us go. If you let us go I’ll let you keep doing your thing. You can do whatever you want with this universe. I mean, that’s sort of how the series played out anyways.”

Q seemed to be considering his offer. “How do I know you will keep your word?”

“You don’t,” Gabriel replied honestly. “But these idiots don’t belong here.”

“Agreed. Fine, take them back to where they came from,” Q said with resolve. “However, I plan to make things more interesting.”

“No way. This is not a negotiation.”

“I never said that it was,” said Q with an ominous grin.

Then Q snapped his fingers poignantly. 

Gabriel was back on Earth. He could see the two hunters and his brother standing close to their classic car. However, all was not as it was meant to be. Q was very obviously messing with things and having a laugh. 

There were now three additional people in this reality that never existed before.

......

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ba ba bum! Who came with them? How will they cope? How will they send them back? So many questions. Thanks for reading!
> 
> PS-yes Sam got him some. That guy always get left out.


	13. Get a Room

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Team Free Will now have to contend with 3 unhappy visitors. But it’s late so they go back to the motel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Side note for context: Squeezed this into Supernatural canon between the Convention episode (The Real Ghostbusters) and the one where we lose Ellen and Joe (Abandon all hope).

It was cold and raining and miserable. Sam, Castiel and Dean were soaking wet, standing in the mud next to the Impala; and Dean had never been so happy to see his baby.

“Ha! Sammy, we’re back!” Dean exclaimed, elated.

They were standing on the edge of the trailer park, exactly where they had disappeared from. For some reason Sam didn’t looked as excited as his brother.

“What’s with the grumpy face?” Dean asked with a mock pout.

“Dean, I don’t think this is over,” said Sam.

“Oh no?” his brother questioned. “We’re here,” he said gesturing to Sam and Cas. Then he motioned to the car. “Baby’s here.”

“And so are they,” added Castiel, nodding at Dean. Well, not at Dean, but rather behind him as to indicate the two other people who had inexplicably come with them.

The elder hunter turned around to find one drenched looking half-Betazoid and one fascinated, glow-in-the-dark android.

“What the hell!?” Dean blurted inelegantly.

“It’s freezing,” complained Deanna as she hugged herself and shivered.

“Correction, Counsellor, it is well above freezing at a temperature of—.”

“Oh shut up, Data!” she shouted without humour.

Dean jumped into action. He took his jacket off and draped it over the woman’s shoulders. “This should help a little,” he said kindly. 

Deanna smiled, though it was strained, and gratefully accepted the offering.

“We should get everyone into the car,” suggested Sam. “Especially before anyone sees the six foot tall golden man.”

Suddenly the Impala’s horn honked, startling everyone.

“Damn it, Cas!” Dean yelled reflexively.

“It wasn’t me, Dean,” said Cas, still standing in the rain with the rest of them.

Everyone turned at the same time to see a head duck down below the steering wheel.

“Oops, sorry,” said Wesley, embarrassed that he had unintentionally made the noise.

“Oh great, ‘Stand By Me’ is messing with my baby,” muttered Dean. “Back seat, Crusher, now!”

The teenaged boy sheepishly climbed into the back seat. Dean realized too late that he should have given the kid more specific instructions and he cringed as the boy’s Starfleet issue boots treaded on the car’s leather interior.

“So we were sent back to where and when we belong, but now we have Troi, Data and Wesley with is?” Sam rambled, slightly miffed that Beverly wasn’t among them.

“Can we please get in your vehicle now?” Deanna interrupted. “We can figure this out later, when we’re out of the damp and cold.”

“Dee’s right,” said Dean with a nod. “Let’s get back to the motel and work this thing out. You know as long as we’re done collecting strays from the twenty-fourth century.”

“I believe that it is safe to assume that the three of us are the only members of our crew to have come with you,” surmised Data. “Though I do not understand why.”

“Makes a kind of sense, I guess,” concluded Sam. “Three of us went there and three of them came back.”

“We’ll work it out after,” said Dean as he unlocked the other doors.

“Will we all fit?” wondered Castiel.

“Unless your wings are working again we’ll have to,” retorted Dean. 

“No, Dean. They are not,” Cas replied with a frown.

“If you and I sit in the back with Wesley between us and Deanna on my lap, we will manage,” Data explained to the angel.

Sam and Dean exchanged a look, but Sam seemed to warn Dean off from saying anything inappropriate. 

“Okay, you heard the mechanical man,” said Dean rallying them to action. “Everyone into the car.”

They all piled into Baby. When Deanna first sat down she let out a squeak and gave Data a sour look. This made Dean chortle to himself.

“Seriously, Dude,” he said to his brother in hushed tones. “How long do you think Data’s been waiting to get that beauty to sit in his lap?”

“Shut up and drive, please,” Sam scoffed under his breath, unimpressed.

“Fine, fine,” said Dean as he started the engine, revving it a couple of times for effect. “Aw man, it is so good to be home.”

......

They decided to call in reinforcements; Ellen and her daughter Jo. However, it was late so they wouldn’t meet up with them until the next morning.

The six arrived at the motel and tumbled back out of the Impala. Wesley yawned and stretched while Deanna visibly cringed at their accommodations; and that was before they even entered the room.

“By the Sacred Chalice of Rixx!” the woman shouted as the door swung open.

It wasn’t that bad by Winchester standards. Sure the place looked like a disco tech, but who didn’t mind a few extra flashing coloured lights and vinyl on the walls? Data squinted at his multiple reflections in the fractured mirror mounted by the entry way, while Castiel walked past him and claimed a chair.

“It’s not that bad,” commented Wes as he checked out one of the beds. “What are ‘magic fingers’?” he asked as he curiously studied the change slot beside the headboard.

“Was what Dee said a bad thing?” Dean asked his brother, lowering his voice. 

“I can’t say that I’ve ever heard her say it before, but their show was coded as family friendly,” replied Sam just as softly.

“Dude, what you did with the kid’s mom was not family friendly,” Dean shot back in an exaggerated whisper.

“Shush, Dean. You were just as bad,” hissed Sam as he motioned at Wesley. “And keep quiet. He doesn’t know anything about it.”

“Well, good. That sort of thing could mess him up,” retorted the elder hunter.

“Tell me about it,” snarked Wesley, who was not stupid and heard the entire exchange. It was a small room. “And just because you messed around with my mom doesn’t mean I have to do what you say. Looks like this thing takes quarters,” he added holding out his hand.

The two brothers exchanged a look before Sam dug around in one of his pockets and gave the boy some loose change.

As the bed began to vibrate Data sat at the foot of it while Wes lay down with his head popped up on the pillows. It was like a really bad acid trip at a sci-fi convention, watching the two dressed in their Starfleet uniforms enjoy themselves.

Deanna took off for the bathroom, slamming the door behind her. A moment later she screamed and Dean went to check on her. There was a spider in the sink. He cupped the thing in his hands and took it outside.

“Wow, for a lady from the future you sure are intolerant,” Dean remarked when he returned.

“I didn’t know if it was poisonous, or if it would jump at my face,” she said, her ego bruised by his taunt. “That was awfully considerate of you, though. Not only coming to my aid but putting the poor thing out of doors where it belongs.”

“See, I’m a nice guy,” he said with a charming grin. “Now if it had been a roach...I would have smashed it dead. If you see one of those just whack it with your boot.”

Deanna groaned and closed the bathroom door again.

They needed to decide who would sleep where. Castiel—who actually needed sleep from time to time—had already passed out in the comfy arm chair so that was settled. Data, however, did not. He agreed to spend the night out in the car to save them all space and so no one felt like he was watching them while they slept.

Deanna agreed to sleep in a bed with Wesley as long as the boy refrained from kicking her. That left Sam and Dean. They played ‘rock, paper, scissors’ to decide who got the other bed and who got the floor. Both were too broad and tall to share. In the end Sam won and Dean grumbled for a solid ten minutes.

In the middle of the night Dean awoke when someone walked over him to get to the door. He could tell by the silhouette that it was Deanna. He sighed and threw his blanket over his shoulders before following her out. No sense ignoring her departure only to wake up in the morning and find that she and Data had taken off with his baby.

Deanna stood shivering by the vending machine. She had seen it when they arrived, but was now uncertain how to make it work. She was crouching down with her hand inserted into the bottom of it when Dean found her.

“Hungry?” he asked. He could see his breath in the dim light of the overhang.

“Not especially,” she said with a frown. “I couldn’t sleep because I’m upset. And when I’m upset I like to have chocolate. It’s my vice.”

Dean smiled down at her. He helped her to get her hand back out of the machine and showed her how to feed a bill into the slot. 

“Take your pick. What would you like,” he offered politely.

She pointed at a ‘Three Musketeers’ bar and bit her lower lip. 

“That’s a good choice but it’s super sweet,” he informed her. “If you’re looking for darker chocolate I would go for the Hershey bar.”

She examined the one he suggested and it did say it was dark chocolate right on the wrapper. She nodded and then waited while he keyed in the code. She watched the machine as it released the candy and it fell towards the slot. She dove down and snatched her prize. A moment later she had it unwrapped and was biting into it. She hummed with satisfaction before offering him a taste.

“No thanks, I’m good. My vice after a bad day is alcohol and lots of it,” he told her plainly.

“Well, thank you for your help,” she said after swallowing. “I’m sorry I was so ungrateful earlier. I think I’m still peeved about what happened.”

“Hey, me too. Do you think I wanted to screw around with some fake version of you?”

“Dean...if there is any validity to what Gabriel said...then even this version of me is fake.”

He could tell she was upset by this possibility and decided that maybe that was what had really been eating at her.

“Who counsels the counsellor?” he mused. “Look, maybe we’re not real either. I mean, who knows, right? I say we just do our thing and make the most of the hand we’re dealt. You don’t know the half of what’s going on with us, but we have a bit of a shit storm on our hands, if I’m being honest.”

He was impressed when she didn’t scold him for his language. “Well...I can sense that. The people here—or at least those staying in this motel at the moment—they are very basic people. Feeding their very basic needs. There are at least two couples that consist of adulterers, and three more where one person is paying the other for sex.”

“Yep, good old US of A,” Dean said with a harsh laugh. “Our morality wasn’t exactly what I was getting at, but it is technically part of the problem.”

“So, are you like them? Do have sex whenever you want with whoever you want and drink and eat to excess just because you’re trying to fill some endless void?”

“Down, Deanna, Geez,” winced the hunter. “We were getting along and everything.”

“Sorry. Sometimes I just can’t turn it off. People fascinate me,” she said with humility.

“Oh yeah...’cause I think you were deflecting and trying to remind yourself of all my flaws so you wouldn’t have to face up to actually liking me a little.”

Deanna took another bite of her chocolate bar and scoffed with her mouth full. Then she shook her head at him while she shivered against the cold night air. When her mouth was clear again she told him off for thinking such a thing. 

“Dean, it doesn’t matter if I like you. You and I belong in completely different worlds.”

“Then have a little fun while you’re stuck down here in the gutter with me,” he said playfully. He came closer and wrapped her up in his blanket with him. “Come on. You, me, a big bed all to ourselves? No flailing adolescent elbowing you all night?”

“She leaned her forehead against his chest. She had to admit that it did sound nice. Plus his manly scent was filling her nostrils while his desires filled her empathic senses. 

“I honestly just want to go to sleep,” she muttered, cocooned in his strong arms.

“Fine. Let’s go. I’m tired to the bone too. Those fancy beds look nice, but they are too hard for me. And I am so done with that damned floor.”

She shuffled along with him to the motel office and together they got another room. 

Dean did her the courtesy of checking the place for spiders. The room only had the one bed, but at least it was king sized. They got in it and shut off the lights.

Deanna was reconsidering her decision about having sex with him, but Dean was already snoring by the time she turned over and tried to kiss him. She smiled to herself and drifted off a few minutes later.

......


	14. Android Sandwich

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The visitors get redressed and Data gets some extra attention. Then they go for breakfast because what’s Supernatural without a diner scene?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry guys...this one got a bit silly.

Dean and Deanna woke up spooning one another. They indulged in a few quiet moments with just the two of them before having to face the reality of their situation. Deanna even let the hunter kiss her neck and never complained once about his rough, scratchy stubble. They returned to the group just as Ellen’s pickup truck pulled into the motel parking lot.

The two women came in and sat at the small kitchenette table while they listened to the story so far. They were more than a little confused.

“I don’t get it,” muttered Jo as she looked over at the strange trio watching Scooby Doo on the television. “What’s with the kid from ‘Stand by me’? Isn’t he like well into his thirties by now?”

Sam rolled his eyes. Was that the only reference anyone had for this guy? “He isn’t Wil Wheaton,” he explained. “He is literally the character he played, Wesley Crusher.”

“You mean that wiz kid from that space TV spin-off?” quipped Ellen.

Sam cringed. He hated when people referred to Next Gen as a spin-off.

“Oh man, I never watched that show,” said Jo. “Why did you even think to call us? I mean, poor departed Ash would have been your guy for all this X-files weirdness.”

“We know, Jo,” said Sam with frustration. “We honestly just need someone to keep an eye on them while we do some research.”

“You mean while we hunt down Gabriel and kick his sorry ass,” added Dean.

“Oh, I see. Us women folk are needed to do some babysitting,” snarked Ellen with offence. “Screw you, Winchesters.”

The two women were heading for the door when both Sam and Dean stopped them. “Look, we wouldn’t ask if we weren’t desperate,” pleaded Sam.

“And we are SO desperate,” stated Dean with honest sincerity. “Look at that guy,” he said waving towards Data. He stood out like a sore thumb with his golden skin. Plus he was watching the cartoon and tilting his head as though he couldn’t quite understand what he was seeing. “How do we hide someone like that?”

Jo and her mother exchanged a a knowing look. “Why don’t we just reverse make-him-over?” asked Ellen.

“Yeah, now THAT we women know how to do,” added Jo with confidence.

......

While Ellen finished the final touches to disguise Data as human, Jo was helping to redress Deanna in something more rustic. Wesley was the easiest, but most frustrating to dress. He could wear almost anything, but he was so much slimmer in the waistline that Dean had to tighten one of his belts to the last notch.

“Welcome to the twenty-first century,” said Dean as he popped the boy’s collar so it stood up.

“What year is it, exactly?” Wes asked.

“Today is November 16, 2009,” said Castiel.

“I take it this is not a high fashion look,” said Deanna as she took a gander at herself in the broken motel mirror. She was wearing jeans, a tee shirt and flannel and looked just like Ellen; except that her thick black tresses were braided down her back.

“Nah, but you might not catch pneumonia,” Jo told her frankly.

“Dude, remember when that Supernatural convention was the weirdest thing we had ever done?” Dean asked Sam.

“Dean, that was last weekend...or it was before we got zapped into whatever this mess is,” said Sam.

“Was it? Wow, I just cannot keep track,” rebutted Dean.

“Speaking of which, what did you get up to last night?” muttered Sam, eyeballing Deanna.

“None of you’re damn business, that’s what,” his brother growled back, offended.

Thankfully that was when Data came out of the bathroom with his face covered in concealer and Ellen was grinning from ear to ear. “I think I did good,” she said, patting herself on the back. 

Deanna gaped at her friend. “Data, you look...so...”

“Normal,” said Wesley and “Hot,” said Jo at the same time.

Sam, Dean and Castiel all looked at Jo in surprise while Wesley snickered.

“I must inform you, Jo, that I am not experiencing a higher than usual core temperature,” said Data. “Even if I was I would not be uncomfortable, or ‘hot’.”

Wesley laughed harder and Jo blushed. “Too bad he’s such a dork,” the boy murmured under her breath.

“I don’t get it,” said Castiel.

“That’s okay, feathers,” said Ellen. “Maybe someday Dean will explain it to you.”

“What!?” blurted Dean, catching the tail end of her remark. “Why me!?”

“Because Cas is your special friend,” she said with a raise of her eyebrows.

Deanna smiled and crossed her arms with one of her ‘oh really’ expressions plastered on her lovely face.

“Hey, whoa,” blurted Dean defensively. “Don’t say stuff like that in front of the therapist.”

“Who’s a therapist?” inquired Ellen.

“I am,” said Deanna.

“So you have a kid genius, a robotic man and a therapist?” she asked with further interest. “Who the heck wrote that show, intellectuals?”

“It would seem so,” said Cas.

“Weird choices,” said Ellen.

“You have no idea,” said Sam.

“Yeah, saying it was intellectuals is kind. I would have said it was by a bunch of virgins,” joshed Dean.

“Family friendly coding, Dean,” Sam reminded him. “They had to fade to black when people kissed.”

“Pssh, whatever...” his brother scoffed. “Hey, Sammy. Did your world fade to black too?” he added with a suggestive wink.

“Why do I even bother talking to you?” Sam moaned with annoyance.

......

The oddball group made their way to the diner down the road. Since there were so many of them they took up two booths. Sam and Wesley sat one side with Data sitting opposite and Jo rushing in beside him. 

Ellen, Deanna, Dean and Castiel squeezed into the booth behind. Dean was a bit surprised when Deanna chose to sit with him instead of her crew mates, but he wasn’t about to question his good fortune.

“What’s a pig-in-a-poke?” asked Wesley as he read over the menu. 

“It’s like a pig in a blanket,” said Sam. Then he realized that wasn’t exactly more descriptive. “It’s small breakfast sausages wrapped in pastry dough.”

“Oh, right,” said the teen. He made a face and moved on.

“If I may make a suggestion,” said Data. “You are unused to eating unreplicated food. It might be best to choose something that will not disagree with your digestion.”

“That’s so smart,” said Jo, dreamily. “You’re so smart.”

Sam raised his eyebrows as Jo touched the android’s arm and smiled flirtatiously, letting her hand linger longer than expected on his bicep. He was honestly embarrassed for her.

“Thank you,” Data replied simply to her compliment. He was, however, oblivious to why she felt the need to touch him and wondered why she kept playing with her necklace, skimming the charm against her cleavage.

“Pancakes and eggs seem harmless,” Wes said with a shrug of one shoulder. Then he noticed what Jo was doing and his too loose pants felt slightly less loose.

“Oh, you have got to have bacon, kid,” called Dean from behind him. “Even just to taste.”

Wesley shook off his fantasy at the sound of the hunter’s gruff voice. 

“Bacon? Like real bacon that came from a living animal?” asked the boy with a hint of disgust.

“Ah, yeah. That’s sorta where we get meat from....animals,” replied Dean in a nonchalant manner.

“I think I’ll pass,” Wesley said as politely as possible.

“You are aware that the eggs come from chickens, right?” prodded Sam.

“Sure, but that’s different. Chickens lay eggs all the time whether someone is there to eat them or not,” he countered.

“He is not wrong,” added Data.

“See, I’m smart too,” said Wes as he gave Jo a winning smile. 

Jo just rolled her eyes at him. “Good for you.”

“What about you, Deanna?” nudged Ellen with an inviting grin. “What are you feeling? I’m thinking of having the waffles.”

“I suppose I’ll have some eggs and toast,” she said after reviewing her options. “Data had a point about not being too adventurous.”

“Don’t worry, Dee, you can try my bacon,” Dean kindly offered.

“He must really like you,” commented Cas. “It’s rare that Dean will share his food with anyone.”

“That’s not true,” Dean cut in, feeling his cheeks start to burn.

“Yes it is,” scoffed Sam. “I can’t tell you how many times I almost got stabbed with a fork trying to steal a fry, or an extra slice of pizza.”

“You eat pizza with a fork?” asked Ellen as she chuckled at the idea.

“Nope. I just make sure I’m armed when I eat around Sam,” Dean said quite seriously. “Have you seen the size of him. If I ever offered to share he would eat everything before I could take my first bite.”

“Oh please...you’re the one who is constantly eating,” Sam retorted.

“Bitch,” Dean threw over his shoulder.

“Jerk,” Sam called back in his typical way.

“Clearly the two of you have issues,” Deanna observed with a lighthearted laugh. 

“You don’t know the half of it,” muttered Castiel. This made the empath giggle.

Just then the waitress came over to take their orders. Everyone ordered something except for Data. He didn’t mind of course. He was fascinated by the way that Wesley continued to agitate Jo every time she said something. At one point Sam had to intervene and get them to behave themselves.

.......


	15. Time Keeps on Slippin’

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group splits up to cover more ground. More fun conversations and strange interactions ahead.

“So how was your dining experience?” Dean teased with a bemused smirk. He was standing outside the diner with his brother, catching some air before everyone else was ready to go.

Sam shook his head and exhaled sharply. “I feel like I got stuck at the kiddie table,” he told him with exasperation.

“Hey don’t look at me,” said the older hunter, “I had nothing to do with who sat where. Man, did Jo and Wes ever get rowdy. Did I seriously hear you utter the words ‘stop misbehaving or you’ll have to go wait in the car’?”

“Yes,” Sam hissed, embarrassed by the whole ordeal. “Wes was being a smart ass and then Jo threw a harsh brown at him and the next thing I know they’re seconds away from a food fight. And Data was no help. I think he was enjoying the show.”

“Wow, when did you get to be such a dad?”

“About around the time you started to abandon me in favour of getting laid and I had to take care of myself.”

Dean laughed at his honesty. “Hey, when you were old enough I did offer to show you the ropes.”

“No Dean, you offered to let me play your wing man.”

“Ouch. That is so not true. Sometimes I would find a girl with a sister, or a friend for you.”

“Sure, whatever,” Sam retorted, quickly losing interest in their banter. “Can we just get on with this and find a way to send our unwanted guests home again?”

“Unwanted?” Dean echoed with a frown. “I suppose the kid and the droid are a bit of a handful.”

Almost as though they had been called on set; Wesley and Data came out the side door with Jo trailing after them. She pushed the boy out of her way and looped her arm through Data’s. Dean started to wonder if they should try and send Jo away too. So far she wasn’t being all that helpful.

“Yeah, they are and you can’t keep them here just so you can make-out with Troi,” Sam noted as he watched the scene unfold. “It’s selfish.”

“Double ouch,” grimaced Dean. “Are you mad at me for some reason? ‘Cause I honestly haven’t done anything to interfere with the plan.”

Sam sighed again and met his brother’s gaze. “No. I’m not mad at you exactly.”

They were interrupted again as Castiel held the door open for both Deanna and Ellen like a gentleman. The two women thanked him and continued to chat as they walked by. Dean gave Cas a thumbs up and caught Sam’s scowl.

“Maybe you’re mad at Gabe because I got a second chance with Dee, but Bev got left behind?” he said with a knowing air.

“What? No. It’s fine. I’m over it,” Sam grumbled in return.

“Oh yeah, you sound like you’re over it,” Dean said sarcastically.

“Dean, they aren’t real.”

“You ever stop to wonder if we’re real?”

“Um, no,” Sam said with conviction. “If you and I are not real than why have we suffered so much? Why did mom have to die and you go to hell if none of this matters and we don’t exist?”

“Alright, fine...good point,” Dean concurred. “We’re real.”

“You know...I’ve been thinking about how exactly we can get Gabriel’s attention.”

“Sometimes I think we need to treat him like Beetlejuice and build him a house of ill-repute. Then we fill it with hookers and candy,” Dean rambled nonsensically. “Or,” he added, snapping his fingers. “We do mud wresting, but we fill the pit with chocolate syrup.”

“What the hell is wrong with you?” Sam questioned with a look of disgust.

“I’m just thinking outside the box. It’s not like we have a holodeck to work with anymore.”

Someone honked a horn and the brothers looked over. It was Ellen, which was lucky because if it had been anyone else they would have gotten a beat down.

“Look, ‘Dad’. Mom says it’s time to go,” Dean said with a chuckle as he clapped a hand on his brother’s shoulder.

“I’m not the dad,” grumbled Sam to himself as he followed Dean to the Impala.

.......

They decided to split up again. One group heading to the local university library and the other back to the trailer park to search for clues. Data made a comment about how maybe there was something about that location that could be important about how the archangel was able to whisk them away. 

Sam and Dean had to agree after Castiel reminded them about the warehouse. Then Sam recalled the mystery spot. It did seem that a location or building was usually how Gabriel would house his illusions even if it felt like they went somewhere else. There was one catch, though. They had been outside this time and literally taken somewhere else.

So, Sam, Deanna, Jo and Ellen went to do some research, while Dean, Cas, Wes and Data went to explore the trailer park. Yeah, Dean didn’t know how that happened exactly.

They found the abandoned trailer that they had been standing closest to the night it all went down. Technically it was last night, but so much had been happening it felt like so much longer ago to everyone. 

“You sure you don’t want to go help with the books and the research?” Dean asked the two visitors, missing Deanna already.

Data and Wesley exchanged a look. “I’m always studying,” commented Wes. “It’s been a long time since I’ve been able to do some leg work.”

“I am a virtual encyclopedia,” said Data. Then he forced the door open to the motor home like it was nothing. “Perhaps once your fellow hunters have come up with a hypothesis I can assist with some lesser known knowledge. Until then I believe it would be best if either myself or Counsellor Troi remains with Wesley.”

“I guess he is unaware of last night,” Cas mumbled under his breath. Dean shot him a look.

“What occurred last night?” prompted Data.

“Nothing,” said Dean with a shallow grin. Then he and Castiel walked past the android and entered the trailer to check it for clues.

“Cas means that Dean snuck off with Deanna for some alone time,” explained the teen as he climbed up the steps. 

“Ah...I see,” the android said slowly as he contemplated this notion. 

He recalled seeing Dean cover his colleague with a blanket and hold her close to his body. 

“I did see you out by the vending machine,” Data called into the vehicle as he lingered by the open door. “But I assumed you returned to the room after your cuddle.”

“Cuddle?” said Cas with a serious huff of frustration. “Can you not behave for five minutes around any woman?”

Dean paused in his search through the cupboards. “Hey! I behave just fine around Ellen and Jo,” Dean rebutted with offence.

“Oh sure. That is only because you view Ellen as a woman who may have had relations with your father and you know that she would kill you where you stand if she ever thought you tried anything with her daughter.”

“Wow, you’re joking right?” asked Wesley, a little nervous of his boyish behaviour with the young woman in question.

“Don’t worry kid, you aren’t even on her radar,” Dean reassured him with a brotherly ruffling of his hair.

“Wait! Whose radar? Ellen’s or Jo’s?” demanded Wesley with dismay.

“Either, I would imagine,” said Data plainly.

“Data!” the boy shouted, his ego bruised.

“What’s his problem?” muttered Cas to Dean.

“Are you blind?” questioned his friend. “The kid has been pulling Jo’s pigtails all day.”

“I didn’t even realize she had her hair set in pigtails,” stated Cas in such a deadpan manner that it made Dean snicker. Of course she didn’t, the angel was being way too literal and missing his point.

“He’s been teasing her and riling her up to get her to notice him because he likes her,” the hunter explained.

“That sounds awfully counter intuitive,” said Cas as he tossed around some items in the designated bedroom area.

“Yes, it does,” Data said in agreement. “Perhaps if you were nicer to her, Wes.”

“I’ve been nice-ish,” the boy said with a shrug.

“Oh man, you remind me so much of Sammy at your age,” Dean added with a laugh.

“Did Sam used to toss food at the girls he had a crush on, too?” asked the android with interest.

“Probably,” Dean said with a grin.

“But you did not?” Data added, eager to get a better comparison.

“Oh no. I was all charm and swagger,” Dean gloated. “There’s nothing here,” he added after a beat. Let’s go check outside again.”

They all got out of the trailer, one at a time and Data decided to climb the ladder on the back to see if a new perspective might help.

“So you were always good with girls?” Wes asked Dean, sounding the skeptic.

“Yes, Dean was very good at luring teenaged girls into janitorial closets,” grumbled Castiel.

Wesley suddenly looked at the hunter with new eyes. “No way? You’re awesome,” he beamed.

“Yeah, I kinda am,” said Dean as he put an arm around the kid’s shoulders. The two them were suddenly the best of friends and chatting away. Leaving the other two in their wake.

“Great. Now the next fictitious season of your series will involve a highly predatory teen who abandons his studies in pursuit of girls,” rambled Cas as he leaned against the side of the trailer.

“Do you really believe that Dean’s advice on how to approach women is that effective?” wondered the android from the roof.

“I wish that it wasn’t,” lamented the angel.

“Why? Do you have a romantic interest in him?” queried Data.

Castiel craned his neck to look up at Data before replying. “No...why would you ask that?”

“Deanna had mentioned that she sensed a profound bond between the two of you.”

“Ah, yes. Well it is not romantic, but biblical in nature,” Cas elaborated.

“Are those not the same thing?” asked Data. To his knowledge biblical nature was also slang for sexual nature.

“No,” the angel assured him. “Did you find anything up there?” 

“Nothing out of the ordinary, although I am uncertain that I would be the best person to know what is normal in regards to a motor home. Though I am not finding any ancient symbols, or markings.”

Castiel was about to suggest he come back down, but Data jumped to the ground a moment later, surprising him.

“Where are the others?” asked the android after realizing they were alone.

“They took off over that way,” Cas told him, pointing off to the right. “Didn’t you see them?”

“No, I did not, however I was not watching for our friends, I was examining the structure of the rooftop.”

“We should probably go find them. We don’t want them getting into trouble.”

“Does Dean often get into trouble?”

“More often than would seem possible, I’m afraid.”

.......

In the library Deanna was coughing from all the dust that had collected in the old books. She looked out of her element and a little cranky. The rude stares and occasional shushing didn’t help matters any.

“You alright, Deanna?” asked Sam with concern.

She sniffled and cleared her throat again. “I suppose I’m just so used to our advanced air filtration systems.”

“Yeah, allergies are a bitch,” said Jo in solidarity. “I think I have some Claritin in my hip bag if you want some?”

“Claritin?” Deanna repeated obviously unsure. A woman shushed her for speaking too loudly and Deanna rolled her eyes.

“It’s an antihistamine,” said Jo, lowering her voice. 

Then she dug out the package and handed it to her. The half-Betazoid read over the card and then proceeded to read the leaflet enclosed. 

“My, but there is a lot of fine print,” she commented.

“That’s just Big Pharma covering their assets,” Ellen told her.

“Can we please get back to why we came here?” Sam asked, trying not to sound annoyed.

“Don’t get your panties in a bunch, Sam,” scolded Ellen, “We’re on it.”

Both Deanna and Jo giggled at the woman’s remark and the way Sam squirmed under her judging eye.

“Fine you’re right. I’m sorry. It’s just...Ellen have you heard from Bobby lately? I tried calling him this morning and it went straight to message.”

Ellen looked like she was giving it some thought. “I think he said he was going on a hunt out west with Rufus,” she told him. “I just hope those two don’t kill each other before they kill whatever they’re after.”

“You’re not worried are you, Sam?” wondered Jo.

“No. I mean I was, but if he’s on a hunt that’s different,” said Sam with understanding. “It’s actually good that he isn’t alone.” He could just imagine Bobby and Rufus landing in some TV land scenario. They would not be happy.

“Oh hey...check this out,” said Jo all of a sudden. She had been looking at a book and marking points on a map. “There are well documented lines of magnetic forces that correlate to each of your little inter dimensional interludes. So maybe that’s a clue as to why he picks those places.”

“That’s fantastic,” said Deanna as she looked over the girl’s shoulder. “You came up with that by looking in a book?”

“And a lifetime of experience,” Jo added with pride.

“And from hanging out with fanatics of all things strange and unusual,” added Ellen, thinking of Ash once again.

“So that’s great and all, but how does that help us?” asked Sam. He didn’t want to rain on their good fortune, but it didn’t exactly solve their problem.

“What if we run down one of your incantations that might send us back,” theorized Deanna, “And then find another location like these ones? Maybe the energy within one of these places if enough to get us home?”

“I get where you’re going and I agree,” said Sam. “But I just don’t know if we can do it without an archangel.”

Just then Sam’s phone rang and he had to pause their discussion. It was Castiel.

“What do you mean you lost them!?” Sam cried with alarm.

“Who!?” shouted Ellen.

They were being shushed and shamed from all around for being so loud. So Sam hurried out of the library and continued the call outside.

“Cas, what happened?” Sam demanded.

Jo, Ellen and Deanna came out a minute later with the map and copies of the pages they needed from the book.

Sam hung up the phone and headed to Ellen’s truck. “They got separated. Now Cas and Data can’t find Dean and Wesley,” he said without humour.

“What!?” Deanna and Jo exclaimed together.

“How do an angel and an android lose one scrawny teenaged boy and a seasoned hunter?” complained Ellen with dismay.

“I have no idea. They’re waiting for us at the trailer park,” said Sam as they all got into the vehicle and buckled up.

.......


	16. I Can Be Your Bodyguard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We find out what happened to Dean and Wes.

Dean didn’t know when it had happened or how. All he knew was that his world had suddenly gone black. He fished around for his pocket and found his phone. He wasn’t able to get a signal, but the light was helpful to get a better idea of where he was. 

He was lying in dirt and gravel. He hissed when he tried to move his ankle. As he looked around the darkened space he couldn’t make out an opening, or make a fix on where he might have fallen in. It was like a tomb no taller than a few feet and he tried not to think about the possibility of being buried alive. He had to keep calm. It was then that he heard a groan from off to his side. Wesley was coughing and complaining. 

“You okay, kid?” Dean asked in hushed tones, worried that maybe they weren’t alone.

Wes took a few beats to reply as he checked himself over. “I think so. I don’t know what happened.”

“That makes two of us,” said Dean as he continued to inspect their surroundings such as they were.

“Are you okay?” inquired the teen.

Dean tried to shift his ankle again and grimaced in the dark. “I think I twisted my left ankle, but otherwise I’m good.”

“Dean...” Wesley’s fear was starting to pick up. Much like how the hunters felt trapped on the Enterprise, he was starting to grasp the reality of their situation. “Dean, were you guys hunting something in this area before you disappeared?”

“We had technically wrapped up a hunt,” he explained as he sat up. “We had tracked a Boggart to a nest an abandoned farm down the road. It turned out that the little bastard was visiting the trailer park to steal things and play pranks. It was basically harmless and we...sort of persuaded it to move on.”

Wesley crawled over to sit beside him. He could tell that when Dean said persuade he meant threatened it, or maybe even killed it.

“Assuming that I believe the bizarreness of a folklore prankster being a real thing in this world,” rambled Wes, “Did you ever stop to think if maybe it was having you on? Like maybe it saw us come back to the park and it decided to exact some revenge?”

“Shit.” Dean had been so distracted by everything going on that he really hadn’t given the little nuisance a second thought. “Honestly, with all that’s happened over the last couple of days I am starting to wonder if maybe Gabriel was the boggart and he was just messing with us in that screwed up, multi layered way that he does.”

“If you thought that then why were we searching the trailer park and not the farm?”

Dean cursed again, under his breath this time. This kid was way too perceptive.

“Oh no,” Wes commented with a measure of disbelief. “You were trying to stall. You want more time with Counsellor Troi.”

“No I don’t,” Dean answered defensively. “I would never stall a hunt for a woman.”

In truth he wouldn’t, but he was usually the ‘wham bam thank you ma’am’ sort of lover. It had been ages since he had to work this hard...or rather wanted to work this hard for anyone.

“Hey, you don’t need to lie to me. I almost went to the library just to hang with Jo, but when I realized that Data wasn’t going I thought I would give her a break.”

“You know she’s too old for you, don’t you?”

“Sure, but I can still have fun ruining her good time with Data,” Wes said with a chuckle. “Not that Data would give her the time of day.”

“Oh, now I got ya,” said Dean. At that age, Sam was notorious for getting between him and a girl he liked. That was why he had to start ditching him if he wanted to get anywhere.

“So how do we get out of here?” Wes asked as he started to get worried again.

The hunter looked at the phone in his hand. It still didn’t have a signal. If they started to dig themselves they could be there for days. Or worse, they could cause a cave in.

“Hey, do you have your communicator thingy, or did you leave it in the motel?”

The boy dug into his pocket. “We decided to hold onto them. Do you think that they might work here?”

“Give it a go, kid,” Dean instructed.

Wesley clicked the comm badge and they both smiled when it chirped. “Wesley Crusher to Data and Troi. Can either of you hear me?”

They waited in silence, straining to hear any sort of reply. 

“Data here, Wesley,” came the android’s voice. It was crackling and quiet, but there was no mistaking it.

“Thank goodness, Data!” exclaimed Wes. “Dean and I were walking down by the tree-line to the south and we think that the ground gave way.”

That was more than Dean had remembered and he was suddenly doubly grateful to have fallen into this hole with the boy.

“Castiel and I will be there directly,” Data replied.

A beat later and another voice came through.

“Wesley is that you?” came a very distracted sounding Deanna over the comm line.

“Yeah, Deanna. Data is on his way to us,” he told her.

“Are you hurt?” she asked with concern.

“Not very, but Dean hurt his ankle,” he reported.

Dean could hear her gasp and it warmed his heart. “Oh no, poor man. Stay close together. I’m sure Data will find you soon. I’m heading in your direction now.”

Then the line went quiet again. Dean could see the boy’s white teeth as a smile broke on his dirt smudged face.

“What?” the hunter blurted.

“Oh man, she likes you a whole lot. You must have really showed her a good time last night.”

“Get your mind out of the gutter,” Dean scolded. “We only slept together. As in we literally fell asleep.”

“And do you do that a lot?” the kid teased. “Fall asleep with women you’re attracted to?”

“Almost never,” he confessed.

“Oh,” Wesley said as the grin fell from his face.

“Now what?”

“It’s just...it doesn’t take a genius like me to see that you like Deanna more than for just a fling. And I sorta feel bad for you.”

“You feel bad for me?”

“Sure, we don’t belong here and sometime soon we’ll leave. Which is why you were stalling.”

“I was not...” Dean refrained from arguing anymore. It was elevating his blood pressure and making his ankle throb. Then he thought he heard something and so did Wes.

“Dean, it sounds like someone, or thing is breathing over there,” said Wesley, no longer sounding so cocky. 

The hunter pulled out his gun from his belt and aimed it around the space with the light of his phone. When the light glinted off of something behind the boy’s head he called out.

“Wes, duck!”

Wesley went flat into the dirt floor and covered his head and ears. Dean fired two shots and they heard something scream and shuffle off down a tunnel.

“Holy shit,” cursed the teen. 

“Did you just swear?” asked Dean with mild surprise.

“Yeah, you think we don’t use profanity in the future?”

“Kid, you ain’t from the future. You’re from an hour long family friendly sci-fi show,” Dean reminded him. “And trust me. It was made back when there was no swearing on television.”

“No swearing and no sex,” Wes countered smugly.

“Whatever, shush so I can listen for that thing again.”

They both sat in complete silence for several minutes. Then they heard something from above them. It took a moment to realize it was Castiel calling Dean’s name while Data started digging a hole to find them.

“Over here!” the hunter shouted as loud as he could.

After another several minutes the android had created a big enough opening to rescue them. Data got right into the tunnel with them to lift Wesley out first. Then he helped Dean to stand on his injured ankle and lifted him up to Cas and Wes. It was slightly humiliating to need so much assistance, but Dean was okay with it because having the android pick him up like he weighed nothing was awesome.

“Thanks, you guys,” Dean panted as he took in some much needed fresh air. “That was seriously messed up.”

“Do you think it was the boggart?” asked Castiel.

“Whatever it was I think I shot it, so it’s probably super pissed at us,” said Dean in response.

“Yes, I heard the gun shots,” said Data as he brushed the dirt from his borrowed jeans. “It was actually helpful in finding your location.”

“Cool,” said the hunter with admiration.

Together they made their way over to the Impala. Castiel called Sam on his cellphone and re-directed their group back to the motel. There was nothing else to do in the trailer park for now.

......

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay folks...next one has a more explicit scene between Dean and Deanna. I just need to edit it ;) not sure if I need to adjust my rating.


	17. Tooth and Nail

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Deanna and Dean argue but make up in the end.

Deanna took a warm wash cloth and wiped the dirt off Dean’s face. Ordinarily he would clean his own cuts, but he was enjoying her attention. Neither of them wanted to say it, but both of them were thinking it. Was it really so important if they went back to where they belonged? Maybe she could stay?

“Seeing what you do,” she said slowly, her words tentative. “I can understand how you really help people.”

“I got Wes sucked into a subterranean tunnel,” he scoffed, trying to offset how sentimental she was being. “I wouldn’t exactly call that a win.”

“Damn it, Dean!” 

She threw the cloth in his face and stood up. If the bathroom hadn’t been so tiny she would have back away from him more, but seeing as it was she could only manage a dramatic side step.

“What!?” he shouted with a sudden outburst to match hers. 

“I’m trying to talk to you,” she said with exasperation.

“And?”

“Stop deflecting with sarcasm and self-deprecation,” she complained.

“Hey, Dee, it’s what I do,” he said without shame.

“Ugh, just clean yourself up. You stink,” she shot back at him before leaving.

“What, you don’t want to join me in the shower!?” he called after her.

She popped her hand back in the room and gave him the finger.

“Okay, she’s pissed,” Dean commented to himself.

When Dean was all clean and his ankle freshly bandaged he went to find the disgruntled half Betazoid. Everyone else was either in town grabbing dinner, or supplies. All the hunters anyways. Wesley was grabbing a nap on one of the beds and Data was keeping a strict eye on the kid.

Data told him that Deanna was out in his car. Dean instinctively felt his pockets for his keys and realized that they had been in his winter jacket, which he had left on the hook by the door.

“Damn it,” he muttered under his breath. “Don’t go anywhere.”

“Where would I go?” asked the android.

“Just stay put and keep babysitting,” Dean instructed. 

Then he hobbled outside, throwing his jacket on as he left the motel room.

When he got to his baby the doors were locked and the radio was blaring. He knocked on the window, startling Deanna. She calmed herself and unlocked the door for him. Dean got into the passenger side, feeling slightly out of sorts.

“You okay?” he asked gruffly as he closed the door and shut out the chill.

“No,” Deanna mumbled as she turned down the music. 

“You wanna talk about it?” 

Deanna looked at him then and he could tell that she had been out here crying; her large dark eyes were rimmed with red. His heart went out to her.

“No,” she replied.

“You mean not at all, or just not with me? ‘Cause I can send Sammy out here when he gets back. He’s the real hand-holder in the family. Cas tries, but sometimes he comes off a little creepy.”

“See, you’re doing it again,” she huffed with frustration.

“Doing what?” he questioned with dismay. “I’m just being myself?”

“Exactly. Cut it out,” she whined. “I should not find you endearing and loveable. You’re closed off and impossible.”

“So...you’re holding a grudge because you like me for all the wrong reasons?” Dean prodded. She gave him a shrug of her shoulders and he snorted out his nose at her. “Lady, that sounds like your problem, not mine. Loosen up. We’ll get you home and then you can go back to your affairs with all those cardboard men while you pine after Riker.”

“I do not pine after Riker,” she retorted harshly. “If anything, he pines after me.”

“Whatever. Fuck him, don’t fuck him; I don’t care.”

“That’s all life is to you, isn’t it? It’s all cheap thrills and bodies to bump and grind against,” she said with a vulgarity he wasn’t expecting.

“No. My life is a lot of: save them; kill that. Win some, lose some. And in the meantime if I get to have a fling and forget my shitty life for five minutes; then yes. A beautiful woman to grind on is always appreciated.”

If he were anyone else she would be repelled by his declaration; but she could feel the raw emotion that accompanied his words. There was a real depth filled with resentment and pain. She could tell that he lived this way because it was how it had always been and if he didn’t then people would die without their help.

She decided to stop fighting so hard. She honestly didn’t know what would be waiting when she ‘went home’. She leaned closer to him and cupped his freshly shaven face. She smiled because she hadn’t even realized that he had shaved. In the low light of twilight without his five o’clock shadow he looked so young and vulnerable.

“You shaved,” she whispered as she caressed his smooth chin with her thumb.

“Sometimes women don’t like getting scratched up,” he said casually.

“So you thought you might get lucky,” she accused, narrowing her eyes at him.

“Who said I was planning to get lucky with you?” he snarked, playfully.

She tapped his face hard in a mock slap and he looked shocked that she would do such a thing. He retaliated by yanking her closer, roughly burying a hand in her thick hair and capturing her mouth with his own. 

They kissed with an aggressive passion for several minutes. When they finally came up for air, Deanna hit him once in the chest. Then she got out of the car in a huff like she was leaving, but a moment later she let herself into the backseat.

Dean whipped his head around so fast that he almost got whiplash. Then he quickly joined her, making a show of undoing his belt buckle before getting in.

The exotic woman was already shimmying her fitted jeans down her shapely legs and he helped by pulling them the rest of the way to her ankles. Then he climbed on top of her, but as he went to begin kissing her again he paused.

“Just watch your boot heels on the back of the seat,” he said heatedly like it was a come on.

She was too turned on to argue with him about how stupid he was being. He already had one of his large, capable hands under her shirt and undoing her bra. Her own hands were searching in the dark for what she really wanted. 

She let out a small gasp when she wrapped a hand around his very engorged, pleasingly sized cock. He pressed his forehead against hers as she gave it a few enticing pumps. The guttural groans from his throat were delicious. He kissed her long and hard while he played with her newly liberated breasts. She needed more air so he moved his hot mouth to suck on her neck, finding that tender sweet spot below her ear.

Deanna was starting to lose it. She wanted him badly. She started to try and get the message across by hooking her outside leg around him and digging her heel into his backside. She could see him smile, his pearly whites visible in the low light.

“You ready?” Dean murmured in her ear.

“Yes,” Deanna panted, pleadingly.

He moved a hand and to his delight she was wet and waiting. He lined himself up and entered her slowly. She might be fictitious, but to him her body felt real. She arched her back into him as he continued to deepen their connection. She was already moaning by the time he was all in. Then he started to move and she dug her nails into the padding of his jacket. 

They slowly rocked together and eventually found a rhythm. He continued to kiss her mouth on and off to muffle some of her louder cries of passion. As he picked up the pace she clung to him and pulled his short hair. He couldn’t help but smile at her visceral, untamed reactions to him.

When she slapped a hand on the window pane behind her head for leverage, he knew she was close. He gave a few more deeper thrusts and she plummeted over the edge, calling out his name. He could feel her body convulse around him and he orgasmed right after. This time he was saying her name.

Then Dean collapsed on top of her. They were both sweating and panting; and smiling from ear to ear.

“I can say without a doubt that I have never had sex like that before,” Deanna told him with frank honesty.

“In a car, or that good?” Dean wondered with lurid curiosity.

“I suppose both,” she confessed.

“That’s how we do it in the real world, Dee,” he said with a tantalizing flare. “No fading to black.” She didn’t quite understand his reference, but kissed him again and scraped her teeth on his lower lip.

“Then maybe I’d like to stay,” she hummed.

After a few minutes of easy laughter and several more heated kisses, there came a knock on the window. 

.......

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Should I change the rating? I am actually so super happy with this scene. Writing these sorts of things is always a challenge, but I think this one came out well. Cheers and thanks for reading!


	18. Scramble

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A quick transitional scene where we discover someone else is missing.

Dean frowned that their fun was being cut short. He moved off of Deanna and adjusted himself. She in turn began doing up her shirt and trying to cover herself for modesty.

Dean leaned over and rolled down the fogged up window with the manual crank. “What?”

“Dean, you are such a dog!” 

It was Wesley and the hunter wanted to kill the brat.

Dean opened the car door and almost tripped over as he scrambled to get out while putting too much weight on his weakened ankle. Then he confronted the little jerk.

“What are you doing out here!?” Dean yelled.

Deanna redressed herself in a hurried panic behind him.

“I woke up and everyone was gone,” Wes said with a sliver of fear in his voice.

“What do you mean gone?” asked Deanna as she leaned forward towards the open door.

“Where’s Data?” Dean questioned, unimpressed by the teen’s hurt expression. “He was supposed to stay in the room with you.”

“I don’t know what to tell you,” Wes said full of nervous energy. “I woke up and it was dark and no one was around. I was just relieved to see that your car was still here.”

Dean locked up his baby and the three of them went back inside to investigate. Sure enough there was no sign of the android. Dean flipped open his phone and dialled his brother. It went to message.

“You’re sure you saw Data before you came outside?” questioned Deanna.

The hunter’s frown deepened. “Yes, I spoke to him and everything.”

He was already trying Ellen’s phone. Luckily, she picked up.

“Ellen, it’s Dean. Are the four of you together?”

“Yeah, we’ll be pulling up in just a minute,” she told him. “What’s the panic? Sam said you just tried to call him.”

“Yeah...we seem to be one man down,” he explained as he scratched the back of his head. Then he felt something tacky and realized Deanna’s long nails must have scraped his skin.

“Who’s missing this time?” he could hear Sam ask.

“It’s Data. Though he could be walking around outside for all we know. But I don’t want us to separate again.”

“Good call,” said Ellen. “We’re here now.”

They could see the headlights through the windows of the motel room. Dean opened the door and Ellen and Jo came in with takeout in their arms, while Sam and Castiel had other items.

“Maybe the android went back to his reality,” offered Cas.

“Darn, I hope not,” muttered Jo.

“That doesn’t track,” said Wes. “It was hard work to them sent back here again.”

“We got the stuff we need for the ritual, Dean,” said Sam. “Do we really think he’s missing?”

“This is all my fault,” muttered Deanna.

“No it isn’t,” countered Dean. “It’s mine. I was supposed to be in charge and I let us wander away from each other.”

“But you two were literally parked out front,” said Wesley coming to their defence. “There’s no way that Data walked out there and didn’t see the car rocking and get suspicious.”

“The car was rocking, Dean?” asked Sam with a look of disappointment.

“Don’t be mad at Dean,” said Deanna. “I went out there first.”

“So are we thinking he disappeared from this room?” asked Castiel as he looked around.

Jo darted for the door and Wesley called after her. “Where are you going?”

“There are too many of us to just bounce around this one room and try to figure out what happened,” she told him. “I’m going to check the woods behind the motel.” She cocked her shotgun for effect and went out the door.

Wes ran out after her and Sam followed. Dean wanted to go too, but his ankle made it impossible for him to keep up.

“Anyone else want to run off into the dark?” Dean questioned with annoyance.

“Calm down, honey,” said Ellen, the voice of reason. “It may be dark out, but it’s only a little after five-thirty.”

Dean sat on one of the beds and started dialling his brother again. Unfortunately, Sam had left his phone on the table next to the supplies he had brought in. 

“Damn it!” he cursed, feeling useless.

“I will go...with my phone,” Cas told him. “I will call you if we find anything.”

Deanna sat down next to Dean and put an arm around his back. Thankfully he didn’t pull away from her this time, but leaned into her for comfort.

“This is all my fault,” he muttered.

“No it isn’t,” Ellen insisted.

“Yeah, it is. We should have been checking the farm up the way from the trailer park,” he explained.

“Why is that?” asked Deanna.

“That’s where we tracked the boggart. That thing that was in the tunnels. I thought I had killed it, but I guess I didn’t and now it’s messing with us.”

“Aren’t boggarts notoriously hard to kill?” Ellen questioned.

“Yeah,” replied Dean.

“So quit your whining,” the woman scoffed. “You thought you had it and ya didn’t and shit happens.”

“I have to agree, Dean,” Deanna added with a grin. “Ellen makes a good argument. Besides, you and Wesley were a mess and we weren’t going to go searching a farm at dusk.”

“Well, me and Sam could have,” he pouted.

“You Winchesters...always with the whole damn world on your shoulders,” complained Ellen. “That android fella is probably just out for a walk. No sense getting so worked up over nothing.”

“Deanna, you can sense people,” Dean said out of the blue. “Can you sense Data?”

“Unfortunately, Data is the one person I can never sense,” she said with humility.

“What about your badge?” he asked.

Deanna tried to contact Data and Wesley to no avail. For some reason it wasn’t working anymore.

“That’s not good,” Ellen stated, thinking she had better retract her earlier remarks. Things were maybe more complicated than she thought.

.....


	19. Ghost in the Shell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Data is found things are not quite right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: character death.

Out in the woods Jo and Wesley were calling Data’s name. Sam and Castiel went off in the opposite direction. 

Jo suddenly tripped in what was probably a gopher hole, but Wes managed to catch her before she tumbled to the ground. They stood still for a moment as he held her in his arms.

“Thanks kid,” she said with appreciation. Then she righted herself and pulled away from him.

Wesley was disappointed by how quickly she dismissed him. “You know, I’m seventeen,” he said, annoyed that she kept calling him a kid.

“Yeah and I’m too old for you,” she responded without missing a beat. “Besides, you don’t really exist in this reality.”

“Thanks a lot,” Wes snarked, his feelings hurt. 

Jo heard him head off away from her and she passed her flashlight where she thought he was, he was suddenly gone.

“Shit,” she muttered to herself. That was all she needed was the blame of losing another one of their visitors from another reality.

She picked up her pace and spotted him a minute later. She tagged him on the shoulder and he nearly jumped out of his skin.

“What!?” the teen blurted loudly.

“If you want so badly to be taken seriously stop acting so immature,” Jo complained.

“Well, stop scaring me,” he whined.

She tapped him with the nose of her gun. “Hey wiz-kid when you took off half-cocked just now, what did you think you were going to do if you ran into trouble?”

Wes looked down at her weapon and scratched the back of his neck. “I really didn’t think that was an issue. I mean...I thought we were looking for Data.”

“Yeah, I hope we find him...and only him,” she sighed, knowing what other things could be out there in the dark. “So, what sort of women does he like?”

Wesley stopped walking and stared at her.

“What?” Jo questioned, clueless as to why he was being weird.

“Jo, I’ve kissed more girls than Data has and that isn’t saying much.”

“Oh no, does he like guys? ‘Cause I so didn’t get that vibe from him,” she rambled.

Wesley snickered. “Data doesn’t date. He’s nice and friendly and everyone loves him, but he’s not what I would call romantically inclined,” he explained.

“Oh,” Jo said with new perspective. “That’s unfortunate. Maybe he just hasn’t met the right type of girl yet. One that can show him how things are done.”

“Good luck with that,” he said with mild sarcasm as he began to walk away from her again.

She could tell that she had hurt his feelings. Even if he was an imaginary person, she felt bad and wanted to make it up to him.

“Hey, Don Juan,” she teased, causing him to stop.

“Yeah?” he asked as he turned towards her. 

Jo came to stand in front of him and grabbed at his jacket collar with one hand on either side of his face. He wasn’t much taller than her, but she yanked the fabric and made him bend down a little. Then, as Wes gave her a questioning look, she kissed him hard. Jo meant for it to be quick, but she was enjoying herself a little more than she should.

When she let him go again, Wes was at a loss for words. Jo seemed satisfied that he would stop pouting, at least for a few minutes.

They walked a little further in silence. Wes was making bashful side glances at the beautiful girl who insisted that she was too old for him. As they passed through a small thicket of trees he was wondering to himself what else they might get up to together; if she was willing to misbehave.

Wesley got closer to Jo and her shotgun when they heard a noise. Then they spotted him. Data was standing in the middle of a clearing.

“Data!” Wesley shouted. 

Jo ran over to the android as he turned around. She aimed her flashlight at him and gasped when she saw his eyes were black.

“Wes, run!” she yelled. 

A moment later, Data had her by the throat and she dropped her gun. It went off when it hit the ground, but luckily it didn’t shoot anyone. The android lifted her in the air and smiled maniacally. That was when Wes knew that Data was not in control of his own actions.

The teen didn’t run away like he should have. Clearly, he had to help Jo. Data’s android strength meant that she could be dead any second. He ran over, picked up the shot gun and started to hit Data with it. He was yelling for the android to fight off whatever was wrong with him.

Jo was kicking her legs and trying to get Data to let her go. When she realized Wesley was beside her and had not gone to get help, she struggled to pull a flask out of her pocket and threw it at the boy.

It all happened so fast. Wes didn’t know why she threw a flask at him, but he opened the silver container and tossed the liquid contents at Data’s face. To his surprise the android screamed; his synthetic flesh started smoking where the water had splashed him. 

Data dropped Jo from his iron grip as he tried to protect himself. Then he turned on his assailant and backhanded Wesley for his trouble. The impact was so great that the teen flew several feet across the clearing.

By now Sam and Cas had heard the commotion and ran to their aid. Sam pointed the colt and cocked the trigger, but the demon possessing Data decided to let go. The android opened his mouth towards the night sky and the paranormal entity left his body. Afterwards, Data fell to the ground like a puppet with its strings cut.

Jo could barely believe she was alive. Castiel helped her to stand as she coughed and tried to take in air. 

“Is Wes okay?” she managed to choke out.

Sam went to check on him. He couldn’t begin to imagine the amount of force a possessed android could hit someone with. They had arrived just in time to see the kid get smacked and it didn’t look good.

Wesley was lying on a patch of dirt. His head was at an unnatural ankle and he had a nasty split on his cheek where the android made contact. Sam covered his mouth with one hand as the reality of it all sunk in. 

Jo pulled away from Castiel, who was keeping her steady. She rushed over and let out a mournful cry

“No! That stupid kid!” she screamed.

“How’s your mojo, Cas?” asked Sam, already knowing the answer.

“I suppose he is dead?” questioned the stunted angel.

Data sat up and looked around himself. “Is who dead?” he inquired.

Jo got down on her knees and made sure his eyes were closed. “Wesley is dead,” she told him with a measure of disbelief. “We were just chatting...he was trying to save me,” she babbled.

“I do not understand. Are you certain he is dead?” said Data as he got himself up off the ground. “Who killed him?”

Cas and Sam exchanged a look. Neither one of them wanting to tell him that he did it.

Castiel decided to at least try bringing the boy back. His grace was weak, but maybe since Wesley was a creation of his brother’s fantastical imagination it would put things in his favour. The angel crouched beside the boy’s body and he laid a hand on his forehead. Jo watched in awe as his palm glowed. A few seconds later and Wesley opened his eyes and gasped.

Jo threw her arms around a very startled Wesley. The boy didn’t really understand what was happening, but was more than happy that she was hugging him.

“Jo, you’re okay,” he said quietly as he began hugging her back. He was relieved that she was alive. 

“How did you do that?” inquired Data, obviously fascinated by what he had just witnessed. Wesley was alive without a mark on him.

Cas was about to answer him, but swayed. Sam helped to keep him standing.

“We should get back to the room,” said Sam, taking the lead. “We need to get everyone charmed up so that no one else gets possessed.”

“Possessed?” wondered Data. “Is that what occurred? I have no recollection of how I came to be standing outside, or of your arrival.”

“We’ll explain everything,” said Sam. “Data, help Castiel. Me and Jo will help Wes.”

The android nodded and they started to make their way back through the trees.

.....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, couldn’t let Wes stay dead. I almost had Jo reference ‘Toy Soldiers’ but wasn’t feeling it. I hope you enjoyed reading this and I hope it makes sense :P


	20. Too Little Too Late

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone gets caught to speed before settling in for another night.

Dean stood immediately as the group returned to the motel room. “What happened!? We heard a gunshot!” he shouted.

“Calm down, Dean,” advised his brother. “Everyone’s fine.”

“Cas looks like he’s gonna puke, so I beg to differ,” Dean rebutted.

“Help him to the bed,” said Deanna. 

Data steered Castiel to the double bed and lay him down. The angel wasn’t completely passed out, but he wasn’t far off. The empath leaned over him to check his vitals. When she looked up, Data was staring at her.

“What’s wrong, Data?” she asked with sudden concern. He did look rather odd with the foundation on his face smeared in some places revealing the golden skin beneath.

“Apparently I was possessed....by a demon,” he told her.

Her dark brows knit together as she looked to Sam and Dean for an explanation.

“A demon!” said Ellen with alarm. “Jo, what happened out there?”

“Mom, I’m fine,” Jo replied defensively, finally sitting Wesley in the chair that Cas had slept in the night before. “Everyone is fine,” she added giving the boy an insistent look, pleading for his secrecy.

“Whose gun went off?” asked Dean.

“Jo’s did,” said Sam “It was a good thing too. It got me and Cas running to help them.”

“I have no real recollection of what happened,” offered the android. “I was sitting here with Wesley as I was instructed and the next event in my memory logs is that of sitting in the grass in the clearing with blood on my knuckles.”

Deanna took Data’s right hand in hers and turned it over. She saw the blood. It was already starting to dry, but it still looked fairly fresh.

“Sam, can you please explain everything,” said Deanna. 

It sounded like a command to the hunter and he reluctantly filled them all in. The gun shot, how they ran over, how Jo had been dropped to the ground after the demon possessing Data tried to strangle her, and how Wesley was hit in the face.

“That mechanical man strangled you and you’re alive!?” exclaimed Ellen to her daughter. 

“I have ethical programming that would deter me from inadvertently maiming, or killing a living being,” Data explained. “Perhaps it inhibited my functions and disallowed me to use my full strength.”

“Yeah, but then you knocked me into next week,” whined Wes.

“Next week?” questioned Data. “I did not realize that I have missed more than the good part of an hour.”

“No, Data. It’s a figure of speech,” said Dean. “So, if you hit him and there’s blood on the back of your hand...then why isn’t the kid bleeding?”

Data emphatically shrugged his shoulders. “Because Castiel healed him,” he said sounding quite unsure that such a thing really happened.

“For a cut on his cheek?” wondered Dean with skepticism. “That sounds like a waste of his mojo to me.”

“He was dead,” muttered Jo. “Between the force Data hit him with and the ground, the impact broke his neck.” She was so quiet that the elder hunter almost missed her confession.

“What!?” Dean and Ellen exclaimed simultaneously.

“Oh, Data, no,” said Deanna with pity. “Are you alright?”

“I am fine, Counsellor,” replied the android. “I was not injured.”

“No, but you’ve never accidentally taken a life,” she elaborated. “Especially not a friend.”

“And I still have not. Wesley is alive,” he said, not grasping why she was so concerned.

“But I did die, Data,” Wesley added moodily. “She’s worried that you’ll be messed up about it, but clearly you’re not. Just like in five minutes Jo’s conscience will clear and she’ll be back to hanging all over you.”

“Hey, shut up,” Jo retorted angrily. “No one told you to play hero. If you had gone for help like a normal person then you would have been fine.”

“A normal person? Jo, these people aren’t normal,” noted Dean.

“Not normal?” Deanna countered, feeling offended. “So we’re just freaks, are we?”

“No one said that,” Deanna reassured her.

“Yeah, we all just want to get this settled and done,” said Sam.

“The sooner the better,” said Ellen, adding her two cents. “This is getting out of hand.”

They all continued to complain, argue and try to make amends; all talking over one another. Filling the room with so much noise that no one could really tell what was being said anymore. Then as it was all coming to a head, Castiel sat up.

“Be quiet!!” Cas all but shouted. The room went very still. “I am exhausted and you are all being petting and obnoxious! The boy died, I brought him back. End of story. Sam go find the charms before someone else gets possessed.”

Sam looked around a little bewildered and then jump into action and went out the door. 

“Cas, you okay?” Dean dared to ask.

“No. Now shut up so that I can sleep,” the angel growled. He lay back down and pulled a pillow over his head.

“Come on Jo,” said Ellen, motioning for her daughter to follow her. “We should head to our room. It is a tad crowded. Deanna, you’re welcome to join us. You know, take a break from all this testosterone.”

The empath looked at Dean and sighed. “It’s probably a good idea,” she conceded. “Wes, come with me. I don’t want to let you out of my sight. Your mother will never forgive me if something else happened to you.”

“Dee, come on,” Dean pleaded as she passed him. 

“I’ll see you in the morning,” she told him with regret. She gave him a peck on the cheek and grabbed a bag of the takeout that was probably already getting cold.

Sam was just outside the door when the three women and the teenaged boy squeezed by him.

“Where are they going?” he asked.

“To the women’s motel room,” Data informed him.

“Even Wes?”

“Yeah, lucky bastard,” commented Dean.

“Would you prefer I sit in the car again tonight?” inquired Data.

“Nah. Why don’t you go wash that stuff off your face and come find something to watch,” said Dean. “But keep the volume low. You don’t want to bother Cas.”

“Oh wait a sec,” called Sam. He took out one of the amulets from Bobby Singer and placed it around the android’s neck. “Dean and I used to wear these before we had our tattoos. It’ll stop possession.”

“Thank you,” Data said as he examined the medallion. 

“I should go give these to Wes and Deanna,” Sam added after a beat.

“You know what, let me do it,” offered Dean.

“You?” his brother scoffed. “With that ankle?”

“I can manage,” the elder hunter insisted as he snatched the other two amulets.

“Fine. Whatever,” said Sam in surrender.

“Don’t let anyone else leave this room,” added Dean as he limped towards the door.

.......

Dean hobbled two doors down and knocked. Ellen gave him the stink eye before letting him in. He handed out the charms and explained that they would protect them from possession. Wesley began studying the amulet, fascinated by how a piece of jewelry would keep him from ending up like Data.

Deanna barely looked at the thing as she slipped it over her head. The hunter waited for her to acknowledge him, but she seemed to be happy to ignore him all the same.

“Dee, come on,” Dean whined for her attention.

“Come on what? You ran us around all day and just happened to forget to tell us about how there are devils in your world? Real ones! That possess people!?”

“Demons,” Wes corrected her.

“Whatever,” she huffed with annoyance. “Then you let Jo and Wesley go off into the dark knowing that something beyond the usual terrible acts of violence could happen to them.”

“Hey, Sam and Cas were out there too! How would I know that they would separate!?”

“Keep it down, Dean,” warned Ellen. “You don’t want us evicted on top of everything else do ya?”

“Geez, it was random,” added Jo. “Usually if angels are already involved with something demons stay clear.”

“Angels like Gabriel?” asked Wes.

“Right,” Jo affirmed.

“Thank you for the trinket and goodnight,” Deanna told Dean. This time at a more respectable volume.

He frowned at her continued bad mood and stole a kiss anyways. Deanna’s cold shielding melted by a fraction and she gave into him. Both Jo and Wesley found themselves momentarily mesmerized before turning away. Unfortunately, they chose to look in directions that had them staring at each other. The boy blushed and looked away.

“Okay, enough,” said Ellen as she munched on a cold fry. “Out.”

“Night,” Dean hummed, smiling stupidly.

“Night,” Deanna replied, blowing him a kiss.

“Ugh, kill me,” groaned Wesley. It was so unfair.

“Once is enough for tonight,” Ellen informed the teen.

......

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look I wrote a thing...man having scenes with so many people is tough. What was I even thinking? Cheers!


	21. Stolen Moment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little interlude between Jo and Data.

In the middle of the night Jo woke up to someone snoring. It was Wesley. She almost hit him with her pillow, but decided he had been through enough. She shivered as she realized that she was exposed, her mother had taken all the blankets. It would be near impossible to wrestle the bedding away from her, so Jo decided to get up. 

She put on a few more layers of clothing and grabbed her notes before slipping out the door. It was still hovering around freezing so she headed for her mom’s truck. She was almost there when someone tapped her shoulder.

She whipped around and instantly had a bowie knife to the predator’s throat. Data stared down at the petite blonde with his golden eyes wide and hands up in surrender.

“Data? What the hell?” she complained as she relaxed. Then she had second thoughts and poked her knife at his chest. “You are Data, though, right?”

“Yes, Jo,” he said slowly. “I am wearing the talisman from Sam. I assure you that I am not possessed.”

“That’s exactly what a possessed person would say,” she said quite seriously.

“See for yourself,” he said looking down and pointing with his hands still up in the air. “It is hidden under the flannel shirt.”

Jo kept her knife where it was as she reached up and found the chain around his neck. She knew she was over reacting, but after their earlier incident she wasn’t taking any chances. Sure enough the chain was there and so was the amulet; strangely warm from being in contact with his body. She pushed aside her renewed desire for him and put her knife away. 

Then she unlocked the truck door. “You coming’?” she asked as she hopped up into the cab.

She slid over to the driver’s side seat as he climbed in behind her. Once the door was closed he gave her an odd side glance. She shivered, trying to warm up. Although it was still quite cold she was reluctant to start the engine to run the heat in case it woke up their friends. Jo looked over at the android just as he was giving her that same wary glance.

“What?” she whispered.

“Why did you insist we get in this vehicle? Is it not warmer indoors?” he asked her quietly.

Jo turned on the overhead light and pulled out her notes. “I just wanted someplace quiet where I could look over the research, you know?” she explained, another shiver running through her.

“No, I do not,” Data said with concern. “You could have gone into the restroom and put on a light and you would have been much warmer.”

“Geez, what are you, my dad?” she questioned sardonically. “I wanted some privacy, okay?”

Data, believing that he had over-stepped, nodded and went for the door handle. The noise of metal on metal got Jo’s attention as he opened the door a crack.

“What are you doing? Close the door,” she ordered.

“I thought I would leave as to give you your privacy,” he told her evenly.

She rolled her eyes at him and pulled at his coat. “Stay. You’re here now and somehow having your extra body heat is helping.”

He closed the door all the way and turned more towards her. “May I ask you something, Jo?” he queried politely.

“Yeah, sure,” she said distractedly as she began reading her notes.

“Are you aware of the entertainment pictorial that I originate from?”

“Did I watch your show?” she reiterated, looking up into his handsome expectant face. “No. It’s not my thing. Why?”

“I was merely curious,” he said thoughtfully. “After Sam divulged to me that in your reality my life was fictional, I began to look through the historical records available from Earth during this time period.”

“Oh yeah? Did you discovery your own series?” she asked with a chuckle. She thought that would be really freaky.

“No, I did not. I did, however, discover a series of books with detailed depictions of Sam and Dean Winchester’s lives. I could not help but want to read them.”

Jo’s mouth opened in slight surprise. “No shit. You found Chuck’s books in a make believe computer database,” she mused. Sam had mentioned them in passing, but she had never bothered to look them up herself. It was too weird. “Anything interesting?”

“I recall several passages involving your character,” he confided. “Though at the time I did not know you and had no frame of reference to compare to.”

A mischievous smirk started to form on Jo’s face until she noticed that he didn’t look very impressed. “What, did that jerk make me into some sort of selfish bitch, or something?”

“No...not at all. Perhaps I should not have said anything,” he said as he looked away from her, suddenly sullen.

His words formed a pit in her stomach. She decided that whatever he knew she didn’t want to find out. It was like that feeling of someone walking over your grave. “Never mind. It’s no fun knowing your future,” she commented, shaking it off.

Data thought she was shivering from the cold and dared to put an arm around her to draw her in close and try to warm her up. At first Jo thought he was coming onto her in some weird way, but slowly she realized he was only being considerate. She was feeling tired and indulged in his kindness, leaning into him to rest her head on his chest. 

“Wesley believes that you are infatuated with me,” Data stated, uncertain of why else she would have pressed against his body.

“You are a very attractive man, even if you do look like an alien with that golden complexion of yours,” she said with a sigh. A moment later she yawned. “Sorry. Maybe I should give up and go back to bed.”

She moved to meet his gaze and was happy to see him looking down at her with sincerity. She figured it was now or never and let her fingers trace the contours of his face. When he didn’t pull away from her, she leaned up and kissed him softly on the lips. 

Data’s eyebrows shot up, intrigued by her intimate act. Normally, he would wait and allow the person who initiated the kiss to dictate his actions, tonight—knowing what he knew about Jo’s fate—he was compelled to give her more. 

Jo laced her fingers into his hair and eagerly accepted his attention, not knowing that this was wildly unusual behaviour for him. They were caught up in the moment when someone cleared their throat; rudely interrupting.

Both Jo and Data opened their eyes and were beyond confused to find that the old pick up truck was gone and they were sitting in some sort of garden. Data recognized it instantly as the Arboretum on the Enterprise. 

“Ah, l’amour,” sighed Q. “I had no idea you had it in you, Data. Perhaps if Jean-Luc was not so impatient your little girlfriend would have had it in her as well,” he added luridly.

“Q, that is appalling!” snapped Picard.

“Captain Picard,” Data said with trepidation as he stood. “I do not understand.”

Jo crawled up on the bench behind the android, practically using him as a barrier between herself and the two strangers. She pulled out her bowie knife and had it ready in her hand in case she needed it.

“Commander Data, welcome back,” said the captain. “Who is your companion? She is clearly not one of the hunters who visited us before.”

“No, sir,” the android replied promptly. “This is Jo Harvelle. She too is a hunter from the Winchester’s reality.”

“Q!?” Picard scoffed, annoyed that the entity was making a mess of things.

“Oops,” he said without concern. “So what?”

“So, I wanted you to retrieve Data, Troi and Wesley,” the man scoffed.

“Hey, all you humans are alike. Couldn’t you simply pretend that she’s the Crusher boy?”

“Excuse me!?” Jo questioned with offence. “I am nothing like Wesley.”

“You could be right,” Q added with a frown. “I don’t think you’re even half as intelligent as he is.”

Jo jumped into action and swiftly had her knife at Q’s throat. He looked rather impressed that such a tiny woman could be so threatening; but he laughed in her face all the same. “Oh I like you,” he said with amusement, “much more barbaric than my usual pawns.”

“I am not your pawn!” she shouted in his face.

Data came up behind Jo and persuaded her to put her knife down. “You cannot hurt him with your blade,” he told her softly. “Please remain civil and we will see about rectifying this egregious error.”

Jo complied, knowing she was out of her depth. She was by no means a damsel in distress, but decided that since Data was her only known ally that she would do as he instructed.

“Fine. But I am not leaving your side,” she told him adamantly.

“Ah, young love,” said Q lyrically. “Well...I think I need some time to figure this out some more. TTFN.”

“Q!” Picard’s indignation fell on deaf ears. Q snapped his fingers and was gone. 

“TTFN?” questioned Data.

“Don’t look at me,” grumbled the captain.

“Ta-ta for now,” Jo explained, unimpressed.

“That is not something Q normally says,” said Data with suspicion.

“Maybe he wasn’t this Q guy at all,” she mumbled.

“Perhaps not,” Picard conceded.

.......

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I am on a kick of having a text reader read back my stories...man the typos. Sorry guys! I am slowly re-editing, but it is hilarious. Especially when Dean swears back in one of the earlier chapters. So funny to hear the monotone British voice read his lines out loud! Okay, that is all.


	22. Things Get Awkward

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jo is confronted with someone from her past. Cas has trouble waking up in the morning and Dean has to deal with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shoutout to Stormysea___breaks for inspiring part of this one ;)

Captain Picard held his tongue, keeping his opinions to himself as he escorted Data and his new friend through the ship. He was mildly amused to see the android wearing such ridiculous clothing, though it wasn’t that far off from when he dressed up to play Sherlock Holmes. 

What was actually bothering him was the way his Second Officer was letting Jo hold his hand. She struck him as a very capable young woman so her clingy behaviour could only mean that she had grown attached to Data in their short time together; and that could be a problem.

They were heading to the Brig. They had received another unexpected guest in the time since his crew members went missing. A burly, violent man suddenly appeared in the captain’s ready-room swinging a machete, covered in blood. A far cry from the practically passive hunters who had shown up in the Shuttle Bay.

Picard was interested to know if Jo recognized him. With so many lies and impersonations happening, he was eager to have proof of the man’s identity.

Jo held tightly onto Data’s hand as they came to stand in front of several small holding cells. The man, supposedly from her world, was sitting with his head down, face pointed the floor. He looked beaten, but not quite defeated. When he raised his eyes defiantly at his captors, he squinted in disbelief at the young woman hanging off of the android.

“Jo!? Jo Harvelle!?” the man cried, obviously surprised to see her.

It took her a beat to recognize him. He was much older and scruffier than the last time she had seen him. When she did realize who he was, she turned on her heel and dragged Data out of the room with her.

“It would seem that she did not know you, Mr. Winchester,” said Picard.

“Oh, no, she knows me, alright. I think she hates me,” commented the man.

Out in the corridor Data made Jo stop. “Do you know that man?” he implored.

“Yes. He’s the reason that my dad is dead,” she said bluntly.

“Who is he?” 

“He’s John Winchester; Dean and Sam’s father,” she explained. “But he died awhile ago so I don’t get why, or how he’s here.”

“Do you think he is another distraction fabricated by Q?”

“I don’t know. I don’t know anything about any of this stuff,” she grumbled. She was honestly so confused. Maybe John was brought there to misdirect Sam and Dean. If that was the case, why was she there and not them?

“Please return to the Brig with me so that we can investigate further,” he asked.

“I don’t want to,” she pouted.

“Jo, it is imperative that we discover what is happening. Your mother will find that you are missing soon and she will not be pleased.”

“Fine, whatever,” she muttered like a teenager. 

They went back inside, by now John Winchester was standing closer the edge of his cell. Jo, not knowing that there was a forcefield, rushed him in a fit of rage.

“You’re the reason my dad is dead! You murdering son of a bitch!” she shouted as she ran at him. 

Jo hit the forcefield before Data could stop her. She bounced off the invisible barrier, but was so incensed that she started slamming her fists against it. It continued to sputtered, spark and shock her, but she kept going. John watched her with pity as the android picked her up at the waist and carried her away.

“Let me go!” she cried as she flailed against him.

“You must calm down first,” Data instructed calmly.

“Is she always so volatile?” inquired Picard, unimpressed by her outburst.

“This is the most passionate I have seen her, sir,” Data replied evenly, as though Jo wasn’t beating on his arms and kicking his legs like a maniac.

“Jo, Sweetheart, you gotta let it go,” said John, trying to get her attention. “I’m sorry, but it was an accident. Your dad knew what he was getting into. Every time we hunters go out there’s always a chance that we ain’t coming back. You know that.”

“Fuck you!” she spat.

“Enough. Clearly you are whom she believes you to be,” declared Picard. “Mr. Data, please take Jo to Sickbay and have her sedated.”

“Sir?” The android was not entirely sure such a thing was necessary. But then, during his distraction, Jo kicked her boot heel into Data’s groin. On any other man the attack would have been immobilizing, but it only made Data close his eyes momentarily. Picard and John visibly winced on his behalf.

“Yes, sir,” Data added, quickly changing his opinion.

“That guy must have balls of steel,” commented John to Picard.

The captain had to give it some thought. He really had no idea. “He might, he is an android.”

........

Back on Earth the sun was barely rising in the late autumn sky. Sam and Dean were already awake, but Castiel was still fast asleep. At some point in the night he had taken off his trench coat and shoes and gotten under the covers.

“Should we wake him?” whispered Sam to his brother.

“Not yet,” replied Dean. “Hey, where’s Data? For a such an impressive android he is quickly becoming a liability.”

“Yeah, I was sort of expecting more from him,” agreed Sam. “I’ll go check in the other room and the parking lot. You can take your time waking Cas.”

“Thanks, you know how grumpy he is after he sleeps.”

Sam smiled to himself, satisfied that he didn’t have to do it.

Dean stretched and yawned loudly, hoping that would be enough to do the trick. It wasn’t. Castiel was still dead to the world. So he sat down on the edge of the bed and bounced on it dramatically, hoping to shake him into consciousness. Still nothing.

“Oh come on,” Dean whined.

He leaned over his friend from behind, practically spooning him and shook his shoulder.

“Good morning star-shine,” he teased lyrically.

Cas slowly opened his eyes and grinned up at the hunter. “Hello Dean,” he purred.

Dean smiled brightly, pleased that the angel wasn’t pissed at him for once. Then the smile fell from his face when Cas reach up a hand to caress his jawline.

“Um, Cas...whatcha doing?”

“I missed you,” he told him, his voice extra gravelly from his slumber.

“Dude, you were just sleeping. It’s not like you went anywhere,” Dean complained. 

Then he noticed that his friend was still being weird and touching his face. So, he abruptly pulled away and Castiel frowned sadly at the loss.

“I went all kinds of places in my dreams, Dean,” Cas told him as he sat up, hugging the covers to him. “You weren’t there and so I missed you.”

“That’s nice that you missed me...creepy, but nice,” Dean told him.

Dean gave him an awkward, lopsided grin. At least he didn’t have to hear about the guy accidentally having a sex dream about him. He supposed a virginal angel wouldn’t have a frame of reference anyways. Then he spotted the tent in Castiel’s lap.

“Okay, Cas time to get going. Why don’t you fix whatever that is in the bathroom.”

“Whatever what is?” he countered innocently. Cas looked at where the hunter was looking and his brows shot up in surprise. Then his face went red in embarrassment. “Oh.”

“At least no one else is here, so your secret is safe with me,” Dean stated with a chuckle.

Castiel bent his knees to hide his shame. “I swear this is not because you were cuddling with me,” he sputtered. This was not his first experience with morning wood, but it was still not something he was used to and he still didn’t understand the phenomenon. 

“Cuddling? Dude we were NOT cuddling,” Dean snapped defensively. “I was waking you up. End of story.”

The angel could feel that he hit a nerve and he decided to let it go. “Where is everyone?” he wondered as he looked around at the otherwise empty room.

“Next door, I guess. Sam has gone to see if the rest of the group is up.” He cringed after he said the word ‘up’, feeling it a bit Freudian about it. Luckily, Cas was clueless.

It was then that Sam came back into their room in a huff. “Ellen is a mess. Jo is missing and so is Data.”

“Is Wes upset, you know since his girlfriend ran off with Data?” Dean asked, only half joking.

“He was getting dressed in the bathroom, so I don’t know; but Deanna is pissed,” his brother explained. “She said something about never having this many problems on an away mission before.”

“This is not their fictitious universe,” grumbled Castiel as he rubbed at his face, hoping he wasn’t blushing anymore. “This is the real world where stupid things happen all the time.”

“You’re sure they aren’t just out in her mom’s truck?” questioned Dean, ignoring the angel.

“Yeah, I’m sure,” Sam huffed with frustration. “Ellen found Jo’s notes and stuff in the driver’s seat. So there’s a good chance that she was out there at some point, but she’s not there now and she isn’t answering her phone.”

Castiel gathered up the bedding to cover himself as he slinked off to the bathroom while they were talking. It was a strange thing to do since he was still dressed in his rumpled button up and slacks. Sam gave his brother a look as if to ask what his deal was.

“Yeah...mornings are HARD for him,” Dean said with nonchalance, though he did laugh a little at his own inside joke.

“I can see that,” mused Sam, not catching the innuendo as he glanced at the empty bed, now devoid of any and all sheets and blankets.

......

Much to Dean’s surprise, Deanna threw her arms around him and kissed him when they met up. She helped him to the Impala with his injured ankle. It was much better already but he was glad for her attention.

Once they were all back together, minus Jo and Data, they went to the diner. They would need to eat since the day might get long once they started setting up for the incantation.

“You don’t think they tried it last night do you?” asked Wesley. 

“On their own in the parking lot?” retorted Ellen. “Nah, I don’t think my Jo is quite that reckless.”

“Let’s hope not,” said Deanna. “I really can’t sense Jo at all, though. Does she have one of your tattoos?”

“Yep, we both got ‘em,” Ellen told her confidently.

“So...what?” questioned Dean. “We thinking Boggart? Demon? Or did they get swiped back up into outer space?” 

Castiel yawned and smacked his lips before taking a long sip of coffee. “What?” he muttered when he caught Dean glaring daggers at him.

“A little help here, Cas,” he grumbled.

“How should I know? Until I get some of my strength back I’m as basic as you,” the angel said in his own defence.

“Nice, he called you basic,” snarked Sam.

“You’re basic,” pouted Dean.

“Jerk.”

“Bitch.”

Deanna and Ellen rolled their eyes at the same time, clearly not in the mood for their usual boyish banter.

“Can we please focus, my daughter is missing,” Ellen chastised.

“I say we go to the farm and do the ritual,” suggested Wes. He was tired of sitting around while the ‘grownups’ got their acts together.

“I agree,” conceded Ellen. “So finish your flapjacks and let’s scoot.”

Dean grumbled to himself as he dripped more maple syrup on his pancakes. He placed a few strips of bacon in the middle of one and rolled it up. Then he stuffed the whole thing in his mouth.

“You are so gross, Dean!” exclaimed his brother.

“Seriously, did you really need to do that?” whined Deanna.

“Ellen did say she wanted us to finish quickly,” Castiel said, defending his friend.

“See, Cas gets me,” Dean muttered with his mouth full.

Deanna and Sam exchanged a look, neither one of them entirely sure of how to take his comment.

.......


	23. Reunions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another ritual and another trip to the Enterprise. What will team Free Will find in store for them this time?

As the group set up for the ritual at the abandoned farm, Ellen and Deanna stood guard with shot guns. The sky was starting to cloud over and they would need to hustle if they were going to beat the oncoming rain.

Sam was starting to get annoyed with how often his brother was looking at the fictional half Betazoid instead of paying attention to the symbols he was meant to be drawing on the ground.

“Dean, will you please focus,” Sam hissed.

The elder hunter made a face. “I am. This stuff is confusing.”

“I’ll bet,” he snarked. “You do understand that if you make one marking even a little bit wrong that we could open a portal to anywhere, or worse, a world made of cotton candy.”

“I have never heard of such a world before,” commented Castiel. “Do you think the people are also made of cotton candy?”

“I don’t know, Cas,” Sam retorted his temper rising. “Just pay attention.”

“I am!” cried Dean, losing patience.

“No. You’re ogling Deanna over there.”

“Yeah, well she looks hot wearing denim and holding a big gun. What are you, dead inside?”

Sam rolled his eyes at Dean’s obnoxious over sexed remark. “Focus, Dean,” he growled.

“Okay, Dad. Geez.”

Castiel routinely got confused when the two brothers argued and called each other names. Especially when they referred to one another as other family members than the correct ones.

“Are they always like this?” asked Wesley as he paused from memorizing the ritual.

“Mostly,” Cas replied as he furrowed his brow.

When they were finally done setting up they all took their positions around the circle. So far, so good; the Boggart hadn’t tried anything yet. The brothers started to doubt if it was ever really the Boggart at all since no one had seen the thing since Dean and Wes were buried in the tunnels under the trailer park.

With everyone in place, they started the ritual. Ellen and Castiel lit the ceremonial candles and Wesley recited the text, a little too excited to take part. 

A violent wind blew through the area as they were coming to the end of the Latin proses. Suddenly, it was so windy that dirt and debris was kicking up in their faces. Even Deanna had to drop her rifle so that she could cover her face with both hands.

Then it was over. They all rubbed their eyes and looked around. The farm was gone and so was the overcast sky. They were in a dark room filled with a grid on the walls, as well as the ceiling and floor.

“Everyone still alive?” Deann called out as he cocked his gun.

“Do I still count as alive if I feel like the walking dead?” whined Wesley.

“Oh good, it’s not just me,” added Ellen as she put a hand to her temple. Her head was throbbing.

“Oh, no,” said Sam. “We’re back on the Enterprise, aren’t we?”

Deanna’s face broke into a wide grin. “Thank the heavens!” she declared with audible relief. She was so elated that she ran over to Dean and kissed him. 

“I doubt that heaven had anything to do with it,” remarked Castiel as he turned away from the unnecessary display of affection between the empath and his friend.

“So everyone is here?” questioned Dean. “Fantastic. Let’s go see if Jo’s here too.”

The group of hunters headed for the large double doors and Deanna rushed in front of them to stop them. “Wait! Maybe everyone should stay put. Wesley and I can go and find out if your friend is here,” she advised.

“No way, Dee,” said Dean. 

“I second that motion,” Ellen agreed. “She’s my daughter and I ain’t gonna sit around and do nothin’.”

“Deanna’s not wrong, though,” offered Sam, taking the counsellor’s side. “We didn’t think the ritual was going to bring us all back here. We were hoping it would open a gateway or at the very least swap Jo for Wes and Deanna.”

“I do not agree,” said Castiel. “If this is all some concoction of Gabriel’s doing then we should stick together. Until we leave this room we don’t know where we are.”

“That’s unsettling,” complained Wesley.

“So, what? I’m out voted?” grumbled Sam.

“Looks like it, bro,” Dean told him with a smirk.

As soon as the big doors opened the group was rushed by a security team.

“Déjà vu much?” snarled Dean.

“Worf!?” Deanna exclaimed. 

It took the Klingon a beat to recognize the scruffy looking woman as Deanna Troi. He stood in dumbfounded silence as she ran over and hugged him. Dean scowled at her display of affection for the burly alien.

“Counsellor Troi; Wesley?” questioned Worf in disbelief. “You have returned?”

“What is wrong with that man’s face?” Ellen asked Wesley.

“Oh he’s a Klingon,” the teen informed her. “I thought you were familiar with our characters?”

“Just Kirk’s show. And the Klingons did not look like that,” she replied bluntly.

“Oh right...yeah, they don’t like talking about it for some reason,” Wes said after a moment of consideration. Then he added, “Wow, the way you said ‘Kirk’s show’. I think James T Kirk would have been thrilled that someone made a show all about him.”

“Yeah, well if the real guy was anything like the actor who played him I totally agree, kid.”

“Um, so has anyone else from our world come to this one?” Sam asked as he pushed past the pair of gossipers.

“Yes. In fact I have specific instructions if you were to reappear,” Worf explained. “Counsellor Troi, will you please escort the one in the trench coat and the woman to Sickbay. Data is there with Jo.”

“Jo!? Fantastic!” cheered Ellen.

“Sam and Dean Winchester, please come with me,” Worf added, gesturing that they follow.

The two brothers exchanged a look. Dean gave Castiel a quick pep talk and told him to behave.

“I always behave, Dean. I am not an insulate child,” he mocked.

“Of course not, Cas,” Dean assured him with mild sarcastic undertones.

Then Dean gave Deanna a kiss good luck causing her to blush, flustering her in front of her colleague. Worf grimaced, but held his tongue. 

......

Jo was in Sickbay having her abrasions attended to. Although forcefields were considered fairly safe, her repeated attacks had left bruising and mild burns on her expose skin. Not to mention the damage she did to herself trying to get away from Data.

Doctor Crusher was just finishing up with the young woman from Earth when Ellen entered and called to her daughter.

“Jo!”

“Mom!?” 

Both women were overjoyed to be reunited. Jo didn’t even try to hide how relieved she was to see her mother. The two women embraced and chatted. Beverly saw her dirty, worse for wear son next. She tried to do the same, but was met with a little more resistance.

“I’m fine, Mom,” he said, sounding exhausted.

“Don’t you ever get taken away to some other universe like that again,” Beverly rambled nonsensically. That made him smile and he gave into her motherly onslaught of affection.

Castiel was left in the lurch. No one was excited to see him, or give him a hug. He felt like he should be doing something, so he inserted himself in Ellen and Jo’s bubble and hugged them both in order to fulfill some unknown need for recognition.

......

Dean and Sam were escorted somewhere they had not visited the first time they were there; the Bridge and then the captain’s ready-room. 

Sam was busy fan-boying as he tried to take in every last detail of the magnificent epicentre of the Enterprise. He wanted to soak it all in because—if things finally worked out—he would never have another chance to be so immersed in the real thing again. 

Dean, however, marched right into the adjacent office space as Worf directed and suddenly cursed at the top of his lungs.

“Holy fuck!! Dad!!”

Sam broke free from his admiration of the Bridge and came to his brother’s side to see what was up.

There he was, true to life; John Winchester. He was sitting on the captain’s desk with one of his large, grimy boots planted on a nearby chair. Picard seemed unconcerned about his visitor’s lack of etiquette as he sat sipping his Earl Grey tea.

“Boys!” their father exclaimed, jumping up to greet them. “My boys, I thought I would never see you again!”

John hugged Dean first, patting his back with great affection. Then it was Sam’s turn. The youngest Winchester hesitated. Not quite wanting to believe that this was their father.

“Dad...you died,” Sam told him warily. “We gave you a hunter’s funeral.”

“What are you talking about? I was in Trenton hunting a werewolf,” John said with a measure of confusion.

“Dad...look at us,” Sam said with insistence. “How old do we look to you?”

The older man squinted and looked back and forth from Sam to Dean. The realization was starting to dawn on Dean that this was all another cruel trick of the Trickster. 

“Sam, what does it matter? Can’t you just take one second to appreciate your old man?” Dean chided.

“Are you three always so argumentative?” asked Picard, speaking for the first time since the two brothers entered the room. “I never really got on with my own father—or brother—but I would think you can appreciate the rarity of this occasion.”

“No disrespect, Captain Picard, but you don’t know us,” rebutted Sam sternly.

The captain seemed undeterred by the youngest hunter’s qualms. “Maybe not, however I have spent the last few hours swapping stories with your father and as far as I can tell the man is an excellent soldier.”

“Dad’s a freaking superhero,” Dean added with pride.

“Of course you would say that,” scoffed Sam.

“Whoa, boys,” John interjected. “Are you saying that I’m dead in your timeline and you two are still fighting about following my orders?”

Sam’s face paled a little as he realized that was exactly the case. He felt a little ridiculous and quite childish. “Sorry, Dad. It doesn’t matter. I was being petty,” he said with humility.

“Forget about it,” their father said with forgiveness. 

John hugged Sam, this time a mutual unspoken affection passed between them.

Picard put down his cup of tea and cleared his throat. “So, I see you have returned to my ship and this dimension,” he observed.

“Yes, sir,” answered Dean. “We were able to bring Deanna and the Crusher kid too.”

“And Cas and Ellen,” Sam added nervously.

“Ellen Harvelle? Bill’s wife is here too?” questioned John. “Yikes. Her daughter was ready to murder me. I can’t imagine that Ellen will be any less violent.”

“You saw Jo?” asked Sam with alarm. “So you know that she knows?”

“Oh yeah. She’s feisty like her mother,” commented John. “Don’t let her join you on any of your hunting trips, boys. It seems that she’s grown up to be a loose canon.”

Dean gave his brother a half shrug. “She’s more capable than you would think,” he said in her defence.

“I owe it to Bill not to let his daughter go the way he did. So promise me you’ll leave her out of your plans,” their father ordered.

“Sure, Dad,” Sam fibbed.

“So,” interjected Picard, “Now that my people have been restored to their rightful place, maybe we can get you all sent back properly this time.”

“Wait. Maybe our dad can stay here,” suggested Dean, the ulterior motives written all over his face.

“Or not,” retorted John. “It seems like I was snatched from before I died, which means I need to go back so that your timeline can continue.”

“Our timeline is garbage,” Dean assured him. “Stay here. Fight space battles, or get your own ship like the Outrageous Okona.”

“Wow, seriously, dude,” snorted Sam, shocked by the way his brother snatched that reference out of thin air. “Did you really just site Okona specifically?”

“What? That guy was awesome,” his brother blathered. “He was like a twenty-fourth century Don Juan and space pirate wrapped up into one.”

“Indeed he was,” mused Picard, impressed that they knew who the man was. “But I must concur with John. It will be best to have everyone back where they belong.”

Dean wanted to continue to protest, but he could tell this was not a battle he could win.

.....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I must confess that the cotton candy universe is from Buffy the Vampire Slayer (at least I have some vague memory of this). The historical Klingon line that Wesley says was stolen from DS9 ‘Trouble with Tribbles’ episode. Cheers!


	24. All’s Well That Ends Well

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is final instalment of the confusing and over populated mash-up between Team Free Will and the Enterprise-D.

Everyone gathered together in order to discuss what was to be done. Everyone but Castiel. 

Although he was gaining an affinity for humans he was getting rather frustrated with their limited approach on how to handle entities like himself with divine powers. Besides, he wasn’t looking forward to meeting the late great John Winchester for some reason.

Cas knew he was out of his depth and he was drained of most of what remained of his grace, but the angel was determined to try one last time to reach the stubborn, menacing archangel. 

Gabriel had made his point. The more they tried to resist and do things their way the more their two universes entangled and mixed together. He feared that if they made one more false move they would end up with the entire crew back on Earth with them.

So, Castiel sat quietly in the Arboretum with his legs pulled up and crossed in a meditative pose and he concentrated with all his worth to send a message of truce to Gabriel.

After several minutes with no answer he was beginning to lose hope as well as his patience.

“Come on Gabriel,” Cas mumbled into the air. “If we’re here you must be here too.”

Another long, drawn out silence ensued. Then there was a noise out of the blue.

“Psst, Cassie.” 

Castiel cautiously opened his eyes to look around. He was sure that he had heard Gabriel’s taunting voice. A moment later a disembodied impish grin appeared in front of him; like a farcical Cheshire Cat only in human form.

“That is most disturbing. Please show the rest of yourself,” Castiel complained with mild disgust.

The disembodied mouth stuck its tongue out at the angel. After a beat the whole archangel appeared. It would seem that Gabriel had been inspired to make an entrance as grand as Q.

“Tah-Dah!” he shouted with razzmatazz, including a flare of jazz hands.

Castiel frowned causing his brow to crease. “Am I supposed to be impressed? Where have you been?”

Gabriel bounced down beside him on the bench. “Oh come on. Don’t you find humans boring most of the time?” he asked with a playful air. “Admit it, Castiel. Adding some spice and mixing things up is great! You’ve had fun!”

“No, I most certainly have not,” Cas grumbled as he crossed his arms over his chest.

“Oh, why so glum? Is it because your little pet, Deano, has been off making time with the pretty alien woman instead of with you?” Gabriel finished his mocking taunt with a suggestive wag of his eyebrows.

“I do not understand what you are talking about,” Castiel protested. 

“Come on,” Gabriel continued, nudging his shoulder into the angel. “Dean’s been under your thumb since you stopped flying in and out of his life and I think you’re jealous that his head turned in another direction for a few days.”

“I still don’t know what you’re talking about,” huffed Cas with annoyance, obviously clueless. “Besides, once you set things back as they were Deanna Troi won’t matter anymore.”

“Oh no, you’re right. You don’t sound jealous at all,” the archangel jibed.

“My jealousy is irrelevant,” he countered, harshly. “Send us back!”

“Can’t do it. You really should have asked before we ended up back on the good ship Lollipop with Q. Now we have to play by his rules, not mine.”

Castiel didn’t believe him and felt he was being ridiculous just to get a rise out of him. Unfortunately, it was working.

“You are being impossible!” he cried with indignation.

“I know, ain’t I a stinker?” Gabriel mocked.

Castiel grabbed Gabriel by the wrist and began dragging him out of the Arboretum. Technically, Gabriel could have gotten away at any moment, but he was far too interested in what the weakened angel had planned and he allowed the manhandling to continue.

......

Castiel dragged Gabriel all the way to the Bridge where everyone was now gathered. It was like the air went out of the room as they all turned on the archangel. Even Ellen and Jo who had never met him before knew exactly who he was by the responses from the others.

“Hey nerds,” Gabriel scoffed.

“Send us back!” shouted Sam angrily.

“Make me!” he retorted with defiance.

“Look, you keep on whining like a douche about how we won’t play our parts,” Dean yelled, his temper flaring. “How can we do that now if you keep messing with us?”

“You know, heaven doesn’t usually condone bribery,” Gabriel admitted, “But if you play along and do as we say then you can have your pathetic reality back.”

“Is that a threat?” Dean asked, sounding threatening as well. 

“Dean,” Deanna warned, placing a calming hand on the hunter’s forearm.

“You bet your pretty boy ass it is,” Gabriel snarked, narrowing his eyes and doing his best to look menacing.

Cas rolled his eyes at Deanna and was ready to call the archangel’s bluff. “You told me that you had no power here as long as Q still exists,” he countered.

“Is that true?” Sam asked with defiance. “Are you lying?”

Gabriel shrugged his shoulders emphatically and seem to be struggling to find just the right comeback.

That was when Q suddenly appeared amidst the arguing in the conference room. Everyone hushed and looked in his direction.

“Q! What is the meaning of this!?” challenged Picard, his fury in full force.

John knew this was the creature they had been waiting for to show itself. He didn’t wait for any further explanation. He pushed past several people and swung his machete at full tilt. It sliced horrifically into Q’s corporeal body, cutting him diagonally from his clavicle to lodge somewhere in his breast bone.

Worf was on the eldest hunter in a heartbeat. The Security Chief tackled John to the floor as Riker, Deanna and Beverly screamed in alarm and horror.

“Dad!” Dean shouted. 

“Don’t hurt him,” Sam yelled.

“If you’re arresting me, I want a lawyer this time,” John complained from under the weight of the Klingon. Worf just growled his response.

Q casually glanced down at his obscene injury with a strange curiosity. Clearly it didn’t hurt, but he had never been so successfully wounded before. 

“You truly are a perfect example of human barbarism,” the omniscient being quipped.

Then Q gripped the hilt of the large blade and yanked it out of his manifested form. There was no blood, or gore to speak of, but it was still a stomach churning act to witness. Worf, on the other hand silently respected his choice.

“Honestly, Q,” Picard lamented, “You could have simply snapped your fingers. Did you really have to do that?”

“What’s the matter, Jean-Luc? Can’t handle the visceral violence of your guests?” he taunted. “Besides, it will take more than that to end me.”

“May I interject?” queried Data, putting up his hand like a student in class. 

Worf had John by the arm, ready to hall him off to the Brig again. They passed to hear the android out; as did everyone else.

“Data, maybe you shouldn’t put yourself in harms way,” muttered Jo from beside him.

“How repulsive,” scorned Q as he observed Jo take Data’s hand. “You have a human leeching onto you.”

“Human’s are the worst,” Gabriel said in solidarity. “I mean our Father gave them a few simple rules and they just do whatever they want, whenever they feel like it.”

“I had such high hopes,” Q added with disappointment lacing his words. “Picard was so determined to prove that after all these centuries humans were now worth something more than their animalistic instincts.”

“Technically we were all created by people from the same time as these hunters,” Data stated, no longer waiting for anyone to give him permission to speak. “Therefore we are at a deficit and cannot achieve the peaceful, intellectual perfection we strive for.”

Q shot the android a quizzical look. “Huh, I suppose that you may have a point. Perhaps I should send these bad examples of human morality back to their own world so that we can write our own outcome.”

“That would be ideal,” Picard chimed in.

“Wait,” Deanna cried. “Dean, I want to go back with you.”

Dean’s eyes filled with a mixture of happiness and regret. “Sorry, Dee. You gotta stay.”

Before she could argue against his stubbornness Dean leaned down and kissed her passionately, saying goodbye.

“Seriously!?” lamented Castiel and Riker in stereo.

“Just friends?” joshed Beverly to Sam as she arched a brow.

“Yeah...there’s an ongoing debate,” Sam countered, nervously shifting on his feet.

“Well, I had fun,” the doctor said with a smile. “Thanks for bringing my son back in one piece.”

“You’re welcome, I guess,” Sam replied, feeling as though he had very little to do with the outcome anymore. Then the hunter felt a pinch on his derrière as Beverly smirked up at him.

Jo tapped Data on the shoulder to gain his attention. “What about me?” 

“What about you?” the android questioned.

“Don’t you want to kiss me goodbye?”

“No,” Data told her matter of factly. “I do not have any emotional capability and although our interactions have been somewhat intriguing I have no desire to kiss you again.”

Jo looked pissed as Data moved away from her. Then she got a tap on her shoulder. 

“What!?” she grumbled as she whipped around. 

Wesley grabbed her quickly and kissed her hard. Jo’s eyes went wide and she pushed the teen off of her. Then she slapped him across the face for his violation.

“Worth it,” Wes mused as he rubbed his assaulted cheek.

“You’re a menace,” she accused.

“Hey, Cas...do you think you resurrected the kid a little wrong?” Sam asked Castiel.

“I have no idea,” huffed Cas. “I have never revitalized a fictional person before.”

“Okay, Worf. You can let our dad go now,” Dean demanded.

Worf looked to his captain for permission and Picard nodded. Reluctantly, he released his hold on John’s arm. John rushed over to his sons, grateful for their help. 

Ellen stepped up to the man and looked him over. “I suppose I should kill you, but chances are when the timeline is righted you’ll be dead again anyhow,” she rambled.

“How understanding of you, Ellen,” quipped John with an awkward grin. The grin quickly fell from his face however when Jo joined them as well. Remarkably she refrained from punching him.

“Is that everyone?” John wondered as he cleared his throat and took a quick survey.

“Cas, come on,” Dean instructed as he waved the angel over; he was still standing close to Data and Picard.

“Trench coat guy is with us too?” asked John. 

His confusion wasn’t all that uncalled for. Deanna, Data and Wesley were all still sporting their twenty-first century attire.

“Yep. That’s Castiel,” said Sam.

“Hey Castiel,” said John, offering his hand to the angel.

Cas looked at Sam and then Dean and then weakly shook the man’s hand. 

“You a hunter?” asked John with amusement at his odd choice of attire.

“In training,” Dean noted.

“Oh dear, Father!” cried Gabriel loosing his patience. “Enough already. Cassie is your son’s pet angel. Although, he’s been cut off from heaven for going rogue and sympathizing with the naked apes and all. It’s a whole thing with the staring and late night phone calls...”

“Shut your pie hole, Trickster!” threatened Dean.

“Yeah, shut your hole,” second Castiel.

Picard and Q exchange a rare look of shared grievance. 

“So...shall we?” Q asked Gabriel.

“Everyone done with their insults an insufferable goodbyes?” Gabriel asked the room with an exaggerated eye roll.

A murmur went through the Bridge and then it was quiet again.

“Good. Great. Let’s get this show on the road!”

Gabriel and Q snapped their fingers in unison and a bright light filled the Bridge of the Enterprise. Then the universe went black.

........

Sam, Dean and Castiel reappeared in the trailer park exactly where they had disappeared from the first time. It was raining hard and puddles were starting to form in the muddy grass.

The three friends looked around the darkened, quiet area. Castiel decided that if the timeline had been restored then Ellen and Jo were back at home and John was back to being dead. He was honestly just relieved that no one else had come back with them this time.

“Does anyone else feel like they’re missing something?” asked Sam as he blinked through the rain.

Dean touched the colt on his hip and pulled out his car keys and jingled them. “Yeah, a little but what?”

Castiel pinched the bridge of his nose and heaved a heavy sigh of frustration. “Do you mean to say that neither of you remember your entanglement with the people from the Enterprise?”

“Enterprise? What enterprise?” questioned Sam.

Dean headed to his baby and unlocked the doors. “Like a cooperate enterprise?” he asked at a loss.

“No, like the starship,” Cas scoffed.

“Ooh, like Kirk?” Dean pressed with playful excitement.

“No, like Picard,” the angel corrected.

“Kirk would have been better,” commented Dean as he got in the drivers seat. “All those mini skirts and free love...”

Sam chuckled at his brother as he climbed into the passenger seat. “Of course you would say that,” he mused. Then he turned around to address Castiel in the backseat. “What are you talking about Cas?”

Castiel thought about explaining it all to them; their little cross-over misadventure all thanks to Gabriel. However, he decided that maybe they shouldn’t find out after all. 

Dean would be upset about losing Deanna. Sam would be upset that he forgot about his interactions with some of his favourite characters and they would both be devastated that they missed out on negotiating to keep their father alive. So he brushed it off.

“Nothing. Never mind,” Cas replied with nonchalance. “Perhaps I was thinking of a bizarre dream I had last night. You know, I am still struggling with sleep.”

“Yeah, it some weird shit if you’ve never needed to sleep before,” remarked Dean.

“Hey, do you remember that episode of TNG when Q was made human and he thought he was dying or something the first time he fell asleep?” Sam rambled with enthusiasm.

“What are you even talking about?” Dean rebutted, looking at his brother like he had grown a second head.

“Oh come on, Dean. I know you used to watch the show sometimes,” Sam prodded.

“You are such a dork,” Dean teased. Then he turned the key and the Impala rumbled to life. “Come on Baby, let’s get out of this Boggart infested rat trap.”

They drove away into the night; none the wiser of the other universe that was accidentally created as a prank by the Archangel Gabriel.

~~END~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this was a touch rushed, but I think the chaos factor of everyone on top of everyone else and then returning to the moment before it started as though none of it ever happened was the best way to go. Let me know if I missed anything important that is needed. I had so much fun writing this, but as per usually ran out of steam when it came to resolving the ending. Feedback and ideas are welcome (even though this is technically done). Cheers!


End file.
